Think Your Way to a Better Life

Our thoughts are extremely powerful and either get us where we want to go or hinder us and hold us back from what we want to achieve so how do we think our way to a better life?

1. Realize the Importance of the Way you Think

I think the first step has to be realizing how influential your thoughts are in getting what you want out of life. If you realize their importance then you will make more effort in controlling your thoughts and focussing on the positive; if you don't realize their importance then you may just let your mind wander wherever is more natural for you and that may not be where you want to go. We need to take control of our thoughts before we can make them act for our good.

2. Take Note of Negative Thought Patterns and Take Steps to Overcome Them

Once you understand the important of your thoughts it is time to start taking note of your negative thought patterns that do not help you achieve what you want in life. Are you a procrastinator? Do you think that you will put off until tomorrow what should have been done yesterday? Do you commit self-sabotage? Do you think yourself into not succeeding at anything because you don't believe you will? Does negativity drain you of any energy you could put into more positive action? All of these thought patterns can be overcome and your mind can be trained to think right.

3. The Power of Affirmations and Visualization

Not only do you need to overcome negative thought patterns but you also need to train yourself to think positively and the best tools for this are visualization and affirmation. Visualization focusses you on what you want to achieve. It is a deliberate thinking about where you want to be. Affirmations fill your mind with positive thoughts and confessions and help you think positively and go after what you want in life. Picture yourself where you want to be instead of focussing on what you don't want in your life.

Why is Positive Thinking so Important Anyway?

In the first point I said you need to realize the importance of positive thinking, but why is it important? The fact is that when we focus on the negative we are drained of all energy and will become depressed and find it difficult to achieve the things we want to achieve. When we focus on what we want to become we find ways of making it happen. We have more energy to carry out the plans we develop for achieving our goals and gradually our life becomes totally different as we take these small actions and change the way we think.

Start taking control of your thoughts today - think positively, develop plans and visualize where you want to be instead of focusing on where you are. 

Before anything can happen it needs to begin as a thought; so think right.

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Possible Or Impossible - You Decide

And Mr. Webster says...

Possible - feasible, practicable, practical, viable, within the bounds/realms of possibility, attainable, achievable, workable, doable

Impossible - not possible, out of the question, unfeasible, impractical, impracticable, nonviable, unworkable, unthinkable, unimaginable, inconceivable, absurd, unattainable, unachievable, unobtainable, unwinnable, hopeless, impractical, implausible, far-fetched, outrageous, preposterous, ridiculous, absurd, impracticable, unworkable, futile.

Notice there are twice as many words that are synonymous for impossible as possible - does this mean anything? Well - read on and you will discover why so many people focus on what is impossible rather than possible.

We all face barriers when we try something new or take a risk but the real question is do we really believe what we are doing or attempting is possible or doable or are we just trying and hoping?

I believe that very few people (given the population of the US) actually believe that what they are trying is possible and I don't care if it's the Wright Brothers, Bill Gates, John F. Kennedy or anyone who has little experience, few contacts, a poor background or just a victim mentality. Imagine what would not exist today if so many people hadn't just kept trying and believing no matter the odds, number of failures or mistakes and the constant ridicule or invalidation from others.

We have what we have today because people didn't quit and never believed what they were aiming for was impossible.

How about you - a new business, a new career, a new relationship, new skills, new anything - wishing and hoping, staying stuck in the past or going for it with gusto? 

Thinking about writing a book or taking up a new hobby of painting or sculpture?

Waiting for just the right moment?

As a mentor to over 50 aspiring authors I can tell you every one of them keeps telling me - "I have a book in me." And I keep asking them is this book in you any good? And if it is will it help others? And if it will, how many people is it helping while it's still inside of you? What are you waiting for? It won't get done on its own.

Want a new career or position - and you don't have the experience or skills - go out and get them. Stop dreaming and hoping and start moving in the right direction.

Again, how about you - waiting for the right time, the right connection, the right inspiration, the right something? Stop waiting and erase the word impossible from your vocabulary and then get to work and watch the miracles unfold.

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Self-Worth: Why Not Make Yourself A Priority?

When is the last time you did something nice for yourself? Has it been months, possibly years? In order for you to love others, you must first love yourself. A way to increase your self-worth is to make yourself a priority. This may seem foreign to some women. Many of us have been taught to put everyone else's needs before ours. We were taught certain beliefs in our childhoods that we have carried with us into adulthood. Without realizing it, these beliefs have shaped our behaviors as adults. We picked up on certain things and learned certain things based on who we grew up around and what we were exposed to. For example, if you grew up seeing your mother fix everyone's plate first and she always ate last, then you may have grown up to believe that you are always supposed to eat last. I'm not saying whether that is right or wrong, it was just an example to show how our beliefs affect us. Whatever we were taught is what we have come to believe and it shows up in our lives. If you did not grow up seeing or having examples of women loving themselves and taking care of themselves, then you probably don't do that. Try to become aware of why you don't or have not made yourself a priority. Having some understanding of whom or what may have helped create your beliefs positively impacts you.

Self-love is an absolute must. Putting yourself first is good for you and everyone around you. The better you feel, the better your energy. That good energy spreads to other areas of your life. It's never too late to make a change. What brings you joy? What makes you feel good inside? Do you have a hobby that you always enjoyed but put on the backburner? Think about the things that make you smile or that get you excited just thinking about them. It could be anything. For some women, it may be dancing. For some, it may be painting. For some, it may simply be reading a good book. Whatever it is for you, try to get back to that in some way. Take time out for yourself. Give more to yourself. When you're happy on the inside, it radiates on the outside. Putting your energy into something that you really like, love or feel good about makes you feel good. When you feel good, you are more confident. There's nothing like a confident woman who knows her self-worth.

Today's women are doing it all. We all get caught up in our busy lives but we deserve time to ourselves. We deserve time to unwind and do something to rejuvenate ourselves. Whether it's going to the spa, getting your hair done, a massage, etc., the point is to do whatever makes you feel good. Love yourself. Even just dedicating an hour of quiet time to yourself could be how you give to yourself. There is nothing wrong with loving yourself and making yourself a priority. Don't let anyone make you feel guilty for taking care of yourself. You deserve that.

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Start With Desire

"Desire is the starting point of all achievement." Napoleon Hill.

Hill was not talking about an interest, a hope, or a wish for something. He was talking about a burning desire for something that exceeds any other longing.

If you do not have that desire yet for a specific thing then just start with a desire to be successful.

Once you resolve to be successful, start your self-improvement while you search for a specific goal.

That search should consider work that pleases you, a lifestyle that makes you happy, and achievement of a goal that makes you proud.

Depending on your interests, you might have more than one type of work that pleases you. Think about the alternatives in relation to the type of lifestyle each offers or requires.

Let's say that you have the skills to play professional baseball. Yet, you love the idea of spending lots of time with your wife and children. Do the two match? From what little I know, major league baseball players spend a lot of time during the season away from home. And the season could be six months long. Would that be a good match for you, or not?

There seem to be a number of higher level jobs that demand of lot of time spent working. And that work is mostly away from home.

Each of us is different. You might be willing to sacrifice lots of family time in order to be proud that you are a professional athlete, a Wall Street leader, or a high-priced lawyer.

Choosing one area that meets the three criteria I listed and creates a burning desire might not be easy. You must look at all the ideals you have for your life. Then you have to weigh the options in which you might be able to maintain those ideals while choosing a type of work, a lifestyle, and a way to be proud of yourself.

Depending on where you already are in life, perhaps you cannot find a choice that is perfect. If you are already a parent with children can you still choose to be a professional athlete? Holding to one value might prohibit selecting another.

Back to Napoleon Hill's quote. Once you have the desire to be successful, then find a goal for which you can have a burning desire because, overall, that goal gives you the best chance of preserving your ideals and making you happy.

When you have finally found your extraordinary goal spend time daily imagining the details of your happy life and feeling the pride of achievement.

This imagination will fuel the fire for your goal. As your imagination of a proud and happy life intensifies, so will your desire. And continued imagination will cause your desire to burn.

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Understanding and Improving Self-Esteem

Self-esteem refers to the value we place on ourselves. It's a self-imposed judgment of our own worth. It follows that self-esteem is something that comes from within. We can't look to others for it, we can't pay for it, and it can't be gifted to us. When our self-esteem is up we feel pretty good about ourselves. It's that sense of feeling comfortable in our own skin, of acknowledging that we're not perfect but being able to live with ourselves despite the flaws. We tend to treat ourselves kindly and we learn to trust our own beliefs, values and behavior without looking to others for approval or guidance. We're not closed to suggestions or feedback but our confidence remains high as we adapt to new or challenging circumstances.

Contrast this with low self-esteem and the differences become clearer. Low self-esteem is fraught with difficulties. We're constantly comparing ourselves to others and wishing we could be like them, or even 'be' them. It's a lack of personal control and a nagging need for greater personal strength and confidence.

Self-esteem isn't fixed. We can't, for example, go on a course or read a book and develop self-esteem in the way we might develop muscles through exercise. It's true that guidance can help enormously but the point is our esteem is a dynamic process that can increase or reduce according to circumstances. Anyone who has experienced a traumatic event will tend to feel self-esteem reduce. When, for example, we're forced into actions we might not choose it means control is taken from us and placed in someone else's hands. We become victims of circumstance and we feel bad as a result.

It's therefore important to understand that self-esteem ebbs and flows, but this doesn't mean we can't have an abiding sense of self worth. If we become victims of circumstance our lives being reactive rather than proactive. We constantly look to others for approval and our lives become fearful in case we go wrong, in case we're disapproved of, in case we're not liked. Almost inevitably we can't sustain such an approach. There will always be times others disagree with us, don't want to speak to us, turn their backs on us. What's left is a desolate sense of rejection and resentment and low self-esteem becomes reinforced

Improving Self-Esteem

Our inner voice is the one critical issue to get into check. We've all got an inner voice. It's the thing that says, 'maybe I shouldn't because I'm not good enough,' or 'I'd better not in case I fail or embarrass myself or other people'. Let's unpack what's going here.

What is the content of this inner voice? Is it very general in nature or does it tend to focus on a very few things? Where has it come from? Is it some bad experience you had years ago or is it what we might think of as anticipatory anxiety?

Our inner critic tends to be ruthless. It operates in black and white terms where everything is a disaster, a failure or perfect and brilliant. Oh yes, real life is that, isn't it? Put your inner critic under scrutiny. Who says it's accurate? Is it able to predict the future? Can it mind read? Or is it stirring up your emotions based on nothing more than - well, emotions?

For every negative statement you can think of its important to counter it with a positive and more logical alternative. So 'she'll think I'm stupid,' is replaced with 'everyone asks questions, why should mine be less worthy?'

This is just a start, but it's a way to understanding how self-esteem operates and what you can do in order to turn things to your advantage.

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Why Small Wins Create Huge Success

If you are the kind of ambitious, bold-thinking, courageous high level achiever, you probably are a serious action taker who understands the essence and importance of daily personal growth and development.

A daily habit of self-improvement is one of the golden keys to consistent success. This kind of self-investment will lead you to become more successful, attractive, productive, courageous, happier, healthier and more fulfilling life.

As Jim Rohn taught me, if you want to have more, you have to become more. For things to change, you have to change. For things to improve, you have to improve.

The level of success we experience in our outer world is simply the mirror reflection of our self-identity and personal development of our inner world.

So when you raise your personal development set points (self-identity, mindsets, attitudes, philosophy, skills and abilities), everything in your life will be raised automatically.

However, some people approach this self-improvement process in a wrong way, which sabotaged their time, energy and efforts to succeed.

For instance, many of us are under the assumption that the best types of changes we can make are those 'big steps'.

You probably have heard about terms like 'turn over a new leaf' and 'start afresh' as if we could just hit a 'reset' button like a computer and everything will become clean and perfect right away.

In reality, the most effective, long-term, sustainable kind of self-improvement always involves taking small, tiny, seemingly insignificant steps day in and day out.

Breaking out of old destructive habits and introducing new habits into our routine are very difficult and the whole process requires a lot of effort.

Habits are formed when certain actions get repeated over time, and those neural connections in our brain will be strengthened every time they are instructed to fire the signal.

It's like creating a deep groove and then running water along the surface - it gravitates to the groove.

When you're trying to change a habit, you're exerting a lot of energy to go against this natural inclination of existing neural pathways whenever you perform the new action. Thus, you need a lot of focus, dedication and willpower if you truly want to change.

So if you're trying to change 27 things at once, or if you're going from no exercise to exercising 2 hours every day for 6 times a week, you're setting yourself up for failure.

Additionally, when you are overloaded with excessive information, your brain won't be able to process them and you will be shut down to take any kinds of action at all. So you remain as the same old self!

So the best way of creating lasting changing is almost always changing just 1 tiny thing at a time - be it getting rid of certain behaviors or adding a new empowering success habit.

This will make your entire body mechanism much easier to handle the transition when you shift from failure to success over time.

With enough consistency, persistence and patience, you will build up great positive success habits over time and you'll start to experience massive success you've always desired.

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Why You Should Think Long Term to Overcome Immediate Setbacks

Hidden Lessons

It's easier to obsess over setbacks, than to try to play the long game when it comes to life.

After all, obstacles are real while the future is promised to no one.

Disappointments have a way of overpowering you, however, they are just one aspect of your life. The key is to continually move forward and to not become caught up in your problems for too long.

You mustn't allow what is taking place to overshadow your long-term plans. It was Henry Ford who said: "When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it."

Like buried treasure, opportunities are hidden in your setbacks if you are willing to look hard enough. Once the anxiety settles, you come to realise the real account emerges.

Life should be measured in its entirety, not by your failures. If you're lucky enough, you will live a long life. So, avoid giving too much attention to your setbacks, since you are likely to bounce back from them.

That is, don't overstate what is taking place. We have a tendency towards a negativity bias which gets the better of us. Yes, your setbacks may be real, but you will overcome them to the best of your ability.

"If you can remember to look at your long-term goals, however, it will help you put setbacks into perspective," affirms author Amy Morin in 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do.

Move your awareness away from negativity and consider the long-term view.

What could be taking place behind the scenes that you are unaware of?

Is there is a hidden lesson contained within the setback?

Self-Control and Discipline

The value of adopting a long-term view is in not taking things too seriously because ultimately it will resolve itself if you are patient.

You must develop a clear picture of your intended future, instead of focusing on the setback.

Obstacles are part of every person's life. Whilst they are difficult to deal with, they allow for vital personal growth for the journey ahead.

You must adopt self-control and discipline to think long-term.

No one knows what the future holds, but if you have a purposeful vision of what it might look like, you can overcome your short term pain.

"Failures, setbacks, bad luck, disasters; they are there to serve you, not hold you back. They toughen you up and drive you to improve. Frustration fuels growth. It gives you the energy and resolve to clean yourself up, get organized, fix what you can, and take the next step," states author Larry Weidel in Serial Winner: 5 Actions to Create Your Cycle of Success.

Long-term thinking helps you appreciate that things will improve and you are never trapped in your present circumstances.

Time tests your inner resolve, your strength of character and your ability to withstand present conditions. Emotional growth occurs when you allow a situation to play out as it should.

It is difficult to take a long-term view because our minds are not accustomed to think far ahead. We are conditioned to deal with what is taking place now and typically have a limited view of tomorrow.

That comes at a cost to our wellbeing, because if we follow this script we are constantly putting out spot fires instead of working on larger goals.

To think long-term, develop an introspective outlook while reviewing your plans for the future.

Imagine Your Proposed Future

Take action however small, whether it be things such as self-reinforcement, affirmations or visualisations. Success is found in the smallest details.

In his book The Time Paradox: The New Psychology of Time That Will Change Your Life, psychologist and professor at Stanford University, Philip Zimbardo, states there are six time paradoxes that shape our lives:

1. Past-negative

2. Past-positive

3. Present-fatalistic

4. Present-hedonistic

5. Future

6. Transcendental-future

Based on his principles, your relationship with time influences every aspect of your life. So if you dwell on the past, you are less likely to appreciate the present moment and plan for the future.

The key to long term thinking is to imagine your proposed future through the power of your imagination. Focus on the smaller destinations instead of the larger picture.

For example, if your goal is to lose 10 kg (22 lbs) by the end of the year and you are suddenly injured (setback), this will make it difficult to exercise and adhere to your goal.

However, you could focus on the setback or what you can do during this period.

Use this time to fine-tune your nutritional habits by consuming fewer carbohydrates, owing to inactivity. Later, when you can exercise again you are likely to enhance your weight loss due to following sound nutritional habits.

"You need to change your self-talk in order to shift the story you're telling yourself about setbacks and adversity. You need to seek the insight or wisdom in challenging moments," affirms author Adam Markel in Pivot: The Art and Science of Reinventing Your Career and Life.

Focus on the Long Game

There is always some action to take however small, to move you forward towards your goals.

Long-term thinking is something I've followed throughout my adult life. Whilst others excelled in individual areas and gained immediate results, I focused on long-term outcomes.

I experience setbacks and obstacles like most others, yet I don't allow it to consume me. When I find myself stuck in a situation, I consider it a minor speed hump in what is a long journey.

I enjoy author Whitney Johnson's view in her book Disrupt Yourself: Putting the Power of Disruptive Innovation to Work: "As I have grappled with my own failures, and as I have watched others dealing with setbacks, I have observed several responses that seem to ameliorate failure, transforming it into a stepping-stone to future success."

That is the framework of this entire piece - using your setbacks as a stepping stone for future success. It is what esteemed Stanford psychologist Carol Dweck calls developing a Growth Mindset.

"Dweck says it's difficult to maintain confidence in a fixed mind-set without distorting the world, such as acting defensively or blaming someone or something else for setbacks," says Peter Sims in Little Bets: How breakthrough ideas emerge from small discoveries.

To overcome a setback, recognise it as a minor process in what is a greater plan unfolding. Deal with what is taking place by all means, but use the lessons to develop a Growth Mindset.

In closing, I invite you to focus on the long game for your life.

That is where the fruit of your labour lies waiting for you to seize it, rather than dwell on your past mistakes.

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How To Overcome Your Fears, Get Unstuck, And Fuel Your Success

What scares you? Learning how to overcome fears of failure can be challenging for everyone.

Fortunately, all fears are learned. No one is born with fears. Fears can therefore, be unlearned by practicing self-discipline repeatedly with regard to fear until it goes away.

The most common fears that we experience, which often sabotage all hope for success, are the fear of failure, poverty, and loss of money.

These fears cause people to avoid risk of any kind and to reject opportunity when it is presented to them. They are so afraid of failure that they are almost paralyzed when it comes to taking any chances at all.

There are many other fears that interfere with our happiness.
People fear the loss of love or
People fear the loss of their jobs and their financial security.
People fear embarrassment or ridicule.
People fear rejection and criticism of any kind.
People fear the loss of respect or esteem of others.

These and many other fears hold us back throughout life…

Here are a few techniques to help you overcome your fears and fuel your success:
Fear Paralyzes Action

The most common reaction in a fear situation is the attitude of, “I can’t!”

This is the fear of failure that stops us from taking action. It is experienced physically, starting in the pit of your stomach.

When people are really afraid, their mouth and throat go dry, their heart starts pounding. Sometimes they breathe shallowly and their stomach churns.

These are all physical manifestations of the inhibitive negative habit pattern, which we all experience from time to time.
Fear Shuts Our Brain Down

Whenever a person is in the grip of fear, he feels like a deer caught in the headlights of a car. This fear paralyzes action. It often shuts down the brain and causes the individual to revert to the “fight-or-flight” reaction.

Fear is a terrible emotion that undermines our happiness and can hold us back throughout our lives.
Visualize Yourself As Unafraid

By visualizing yourself performing with confidence and competence in an area where you are fearful, your visual image will eventually be accepted by your subconscious mind as instructions for your performance.

Your self-image, the way you see yourself and think about yourself, is eventually altered by feeding your mind these positive mental pictures of yourself performing at your best.
Practice Acting “As If”

By using the “act as if” method, you walk, talk, and carry yourself exactly as you would if you were completely unafraid in a particular situation.

You stand up straight, smile, move quickly and confidently, and in every respect act as if you already had the courage that you desire.
Use The Law Of Reversibility

The Law of Reversibility says that “If you feel a certain way, you will act in a manner consistent with that feeling.”

But if you act in a manner consistent with that feeling, even if you don’t feel it, the Law of Reversibility will create the feeling that is consistent with your actions.

This is one of the greatest breakthroughs in success psychology. You develop the courage you desire by disciplining yourself repeatedly to do the thing you fear until that fear eventually disappears—and it will.
Confront Your Fears Immediately

Your ability to confront, deal with, and act in spite of your fears is the key to happiness and success.

One of the best exercises you can practice is to identify a person or situation in your life of which you are afraid and resolve to deal with that fear situation immediately.

Do not allow it to make you unhappy for another minute. Resolve to confront the situation or person and put the fear behind you.
Move Toward The Fear

When you identify a fear and discipline yourself to move toward it, it grows smaller and more manageable.

What’s more, as your fears grow smaller, your confidence grows. Soon, your fears lose their control over you.

In contrast, when you back away from a fear-inducing situation or person, your fear grows larger and larger.

Soon it dominates your thinking and feeling, preoccupies you during the day, and often keeps you awake at night.
Deal With The Fear Directly

The only way to deal with a fear is to address it head-on.

Remind yourself that, “Denial” is not a river in Egypt.

The natural tendency of many people is to deny that they have a problem caused by fear of some kind. They’re afraid of confronting it. In turn, it becomes a major source of stress, unhappiness, and psychosomatic illness.

Be willing to deal with the situation or person directly.

As Shakespeare said, “Take arms against a sea of troubles, and in so doing, end them.”

When you force yourself to face any fear-inducing situation in your life, your self-esteem goes up, your self-respect increases, and your sense of personal pride grows.

You eventually reach the point in life where you are not afraid of anything.

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Sky Shouldn't Be The Limit

As children we have lots of dreams, becoming pilots, lawyers, rich and famous and even astronauts. But as our days and months turn into years and life happens we suddenly lose touch of our dreams, even worse we stop dreaming altogether.

After personal experience and watching people around me I have come to discover some truths, some of which I wish to share with you, hoping that you would reap the benefits.

Don't Be Afraid To Dream

Why are we afraid to dream? Why are we conditioned and brought up to be in a society that fights progression and stand in the way of dreams? As adults we put a bar on our dreams, we limit ourselves to what we could reach and confine our dreams to walls and ceilings not to outgrow the normal accepted standards. But I tell you even as adults' dreams should live on, and shouldn't be confined to what is possible and what is not. If you can dream it, then you can believe it, then you can find a way to achieve it. Don't stop dreaming and don't limit your dreams.

You Are Your Worst Enemy

So you have a dream you wish to make it a reality, but instead you let the demons in your head get to you first. The could I's, the what if's, the there are many out there like me, why would I be successful? I will tell you just STOP! Stop these negative thoughts and stop beating yourself down. If you have a dream and a passion to do something, it doesn't matter if a thousand or even million others are doing it before you, that shouldn't stop your drive to follow your own path and give it a try. You might feel scared, you might not know where to start, but with the right planning, organization and research you can build a foundation to put you on the right path to work on your dream. Just stop self-sabotaging yourself and believe that you too can do it, and even do it better than others!

Shut Out Negative Voices

When you share your passion and desires with others, wanting to spread your wings and fly, most likely you will hear many telling you "don't do it, why do it? You will waste your time for nothing?" Don't blame these people for saying so as they too were conditioned like you, not to believe in pursuing dreams, and are afraid of the unknown, and God forbid that you might actually succeed and leave them behind. When people bombard you with let-downs, walk away, don't listen and most important don't take it personally, it is not a measure of your capabilities it is a measure of their lack of confidence and fear. Instead use those negative comments to feed your desire for success even more and push you even further towards your goal. Instead find the people who support you and believe in you and pick you up when you fall down.

I Will Need An Arm And A Leg

Another thing that might be stopping you from working on your dream is finances. So you don't have the cash. Well sure that can put a damper on any project, but the truth is to start your own business you don't need that much initially. You could start at home and use social media platforms to help promote your product or business and with profit you make you can put back in your work and slowly grow. Don't think to be a millionaire you have to start out like one and don't forget that most successful entrepreneurs started from home.

Put Your Best Foot Forward

The best advice is to do your best. Work with all your heart and soul; don't get lazy because you are not getting a salary at the end of the month. Learn to discipline yourself in setting goals, targets, deadlines and stick to them. Work ethically and work hard, eventually you will see the fruit of your efforts.

Patience is Virtue

Perseverance is key to success. Even if you get rejections, even if you don't succeed at first, keep at it. If you believe in something and you put the work into it, then no matter what, you will eventually taste the sweetness of success even if it is something as self-satisfaction and gratification for trying. It will not happen overnight, and you will get moments of doubt, and feel it is easier to give up. But don't! You will never regret working hard but surely you will regret not trying your best and giving up too soon. Success takes time, so be patient it will be worth it in the end.

Enjoy The Ride

You do realize this is Your Dream we are talking about? And you are the one trying to make it come true, so there is no sense in pushing yourself to the point you lose sight to why you started in the first place. Learn to enjoy your journey. Every moment good or bad, is an opportunity to learn and grow, so might as well have fun doing it, in the end you are making memories to keep for life and things to look back on and smile not cringe.

And as Richard Branson once said, "A business has to be involving, it has to be fun, and it has to exercise your creative instincts." So I say don't be afraid to dream.

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How To Make Your Own Happiness

Happiness comes to a person when it is caused by something, such as the person achieving a much-desired goal. Happiness also comes when the person recognizes something of value - seeing children playing together joyfully makes the parent happy. Happiness can be caused by expectation of future good fortune, as the happiness of a couple in a romantic relationship. Happiness has causes. It can be had by anyone who is able to bring about and recognize a suitable cause. Below are 6 ways to bring a little more happiness into your life.

Be aware of resources that can be used to achieve your goals -

Everyone has a large number of valuable skills that are not often appreciated: the ability to communicate and interact with people, the ability to set priorities when scheduling tasks, and many other such abilities. Your abilities are valuable. They can help you get what you want. So give them the consideration they deserve. Be proud of all of your abilities and skills. Take some delight in using them and they will stay with you and likely develop further.

Feel good when you succeed -

Savor the successes that your abilities and your resources allow you to achieve. The more you enjoy your successes, the more you will strive for and achieve success. It's a self-perpetuating circle that brings rewards and happiness.

Ask for what you want -

It's a way to make your life better. If it doesn't take away from someone else's happiness, then there's no reason to not ask. It is a tool you should feel good about using because it can produce good results. For example, you can ask someone to baby sit your kids while you get an r 'n' r break. You can ask advice on how to do something. You can ask at a university or state employment center for help in choosing a career.

Be willing to take chances to get what you want -

Yeah, sometimes you will fail. Sometimes you will suffer consequences. Just make a logical judgment about whether the possible benefits are worth the risks. If you decide it's worth it, then go for it. If you fail, so what. If you fail many times, so what. You still might succeed the next time, or the time after that. As long as the possible benefits are worth the cost, keep trying. And feel good about it. 

Be alert to what is good in your life -

Try to adopt a mode of operation of giving attention to the good things. If you aren't aware of what you got going for you, then you are missing out on feeling good about those good things. Being happy requires at least some recognition of what makes life valuable and worthwhile. The more you are aware of the good things in life, the more joy and pleasure you will feel. And to help stay alert generally, do what you can to stay healthy, exercise often, and strive for variety and new experiences.

Go about making your life better -

Take an interest in self-improvement. Be concerned with ways to make your life better. That will allow you to see opportunities to make it better. Some of those opportunities won't work out. The ones that do, make your efforts well worth it.

I would LOVE to hear what you think - let me know in the comments :-) 

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Optimism and Ways to Develop It

Whenever someone has a problem, we say automatically to the person to "look on the brighter side" or "see the cup as half full". Such wise advice may lead the person to shed off negativity. When faced with stressful situations, positive thinking helps us calm down and review the situation in a wider perspective, which can prove to be useful in handling it.

To maintain a positive viewpoint in stressful situations is a mental attitude of optimism. Being optimistic is defined as expecting the best possible outcome from any given situation. Like all psychological traits, optimism is heritable but is strongly influenced by environmental factors, including family environment.

A recent meta-analysis of optimism supported past findings that optimism is positively correlated with life satisfaction, happiness, psychological and physical well-being. Generally, optimists choose lifestyles, which make them lead a healthier life.

Many suggest that optimism is a learn-able behavior. Moreover, it is positively contagious.

The following are some effective ways to develop optimism -

Associate with positive people - Company one keeps closely influences the person. So, surround yourself with people who have positive outlooks. Their positivity will definitely infect you. There goes a saying that if you want to soar with the eagles, you have to stop hanging out with the ducks.

Expect ups and downs - Having a realistic perspective helps prevent things from being blown out of proportion. By maintain an attitude that we all have ups and downs in life, we will be able to face every situation positively. The reality is that life isn't always rainbows and butterflies.

Find an opportunity in difficulty - Optimism means understanding that difficult situations will inevitably appear, often temporarily. It also means that one has ability to combat the challenges that one faces. Optimism implies having a sense of hopefulness that a situation whether good or bad has an inherent opportunity for us to learn from. Remember, the most beautiful rainbows come from the sunlight after a thunderstorm.

Keep positive reminders within range of vision - By writing down short statements that inspire optimism and placing them where one can see them everyday - bathroom mirror, inside of locker and on computer monitor - really helps one maintain positivity.

Work on things that can be controlled - Whenever we land in a situation we think we cannot control, instead of becoming its victim, we should acknowledge the fact. This will prevent us from slipping into pessimism. May be, we find a solution at some point in future if we stay positive. Instead, we should concentrate more on what is under our control.

Practice gratitude - We all have so much good in life, for which we should be thankful. But it is a paradox that we think more about what we don't have as compared to others. Always count your blessings as an old adage goes. This will help frame a better attitude and take your mind off of the negatives.

Appreciate all is impermanent - Nothing is permanent in life that includes everything. However, a current good or bad situation will also change. This belief will kindle optimism in a person.

Focus on the present - We are all obsessed with the past and the future. But, as a matter of fact, life is happening right now. Instead of living in the past and worrying about the future, we should practice living in the present moment.

The trait of optimism is inherently present in all albeit to varying extents. Nonetheless, it is possible for those, who lack the trait, to change their mindset and start thinking more positively. And thus they can reap a whole host of its benefits including improved well-being, lowered stress levels, better relationships and improved quality of life.

Optimism is a trait that makes one look at the sunny side of a situation however bad it may be. An optimist is intrinsically happy because of this special trait. Further, an optimist never fails to affect others with one's positiveness. It is significant to know that optimism is a behavior that can be learned by anyone.

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A Good Chance In Succeeding

We all want to succeed in life. There might be some people who are better than others but there are certain factors that determine just how successful we will become at reaching a particular goal or dream. We need to take charge of our life and never let anything hinder us.

In order to have a good chance to succeed, we need to know who we want to be and let go of our present self to be who we envision ourselves; find satisfaction in pursuing our goals; pursue a realistic goal that can improve our lives; think positively and let go of our fear of failing; acknowledge little rewards along the road to success; take responsibility for our actions and outcomes; build a strong support system and strong confidence and not to blame others for our lack of resources or accomplishments in life.

Another good chance in succeeding is to keep on trying. Success has something to do with how we react to our circumstances. It's actually a matter of attitude and principle. In order to be more successful, we must have a deep connection to the things we want to accomplish. We need to seek for something that is emotionally fulfilling like financial stability so we can spend more quality time with our family.

Many people feared to pursue something because of losing out on something else. Sometimes we think negatively when we consider pursuing a goal or dream. Most people think about all the negatives that may come along with that pursuit. Negative thinking is much easier to do than positive thinking, and those negative thoughts put fear in your heart which is detrimental to our success. When we develop our ability to look at things in a different perspective, we can increase your chances of success.

There are also times when people tend to quit before even starting. That is the reason why it is important to set up our goals. Let us focus on things that have short-term rewards. This will allow us to be more patient in reaching our goals. When we Improve this delay factor, improve our chances of success.

When we feel like we can't make something happen, it's easy to put the blame on other people rather than take responsibly for our lack of accomplishments. It's a well-known fact the we cannot control the situations that may arise in our quest, but we can control our actions.

We need also to improve the number of people who support us to increase our chances of succeeding. If we believe that we can do something, we won't mind the distractions that are holding us back and we can make it happen.

If we happen to have no available resources, we need not blame it to someone else because there is always a way to make a goal achievable. For example, seeking out new experience. The wider the range of experiences we pursue, the more we will be exposed to different people, lifestyles and perspectives. Seeking out new experiences means that we're willing to challenge ourselves and want to keep learning about the world around us.

When we have high expectations in life, the more we are disappointed if we cannot achieve them. We need to be open-minded. When we are open to possibilities without necessarily expecting anything immediately or directly in return, amazing things can happen.

We need to treat everyone we meet with respect. Each of them has something to offer. We'll be surprised at how many people are willing to support and follow us if we treat them with respect, regardless of what they've achieved or where they are in their life. To be successful, we all need help. People are dynamic and situations do change. We need not to be judgmental, we need to have friends and build network and linkages.

From time to time, we also need to share what we have. By doing this, we become better and we focus less on our own shortcomings. There's so much for us to appreciate in life even if our road to success has many stumbling blocks.

In fact, our mistakes can lead us to success if we learn from them. People who are willing to take risks inevitably make mistakes but have more chances in succeeding life.

People are often easily discouraged when they encounter difficulties in their pursuit to success. This article somehow provides some recommendations on how improve our chances of succeeding by never quitting.

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10 Conscious Risks You Can Take For Greater Inner Strength

Has there ever been a time in your life -- a period of real self-enriching growth -- that wasn't connected to a risk you either willingly undertook or -- to a time of inner trial where there was no other choice for you but to take a risk? Of course, there's only one answer to this question, and it's one recognized as being true wherever you may ask it in the world: The prize of greater wisdom and inner strength always goes to those who take, in one way or another, the risk.

Taking conscious risks can be such a powerful catalyst for inner change. A conscious risk involves making a choice to do what's true, in spite of what that choice may cost you. On the other side of any conscious risk is the realization that who you really are has nothing to fear. But, in order to make this self-liberating discovery, you must willingly face those fears, whatever they may be.

Following are examples of everyday events, each of which presents a unique opportunity to take a conscious risk. And, as you'll see, even the most common occurrences hide within themselves secret bridges to new self-wisdom and greater inner strength.

1. Risk Saying No

The first step toward having your own free life begins with daring to refuse the silent demands of others. Saying "yes," for fear of saying "no" is a recipe for resentment. Risk walking away from fear. Say "no."

2. Risk Leaving Empty Spaces Empty

Giving yourself empty things to do can't fill that emptiness you feel inside. So risk leaving that space empty. Allow it to fill itself, which it wants to do, with something you can't give yourself: The end of feeling empty.

3. Risk Not Defending Yourself

It's only when you consciously risk laying down your armor, shield and sword -- your quips, retorts and criticisms -- that you discover who you really are can't be hurt. Risk letting others win.

4. Risk Appearing Stupid

Pretending to understand something that you don't, for fear of appearing stupid, only ensures that you'll remain a fearful pretender for the rest of your life. And that's stupid. Risk asking all the questions you need to ask. That's smart!

5. Risk Bearing Your Own Burdens

The weight of any trouble is determined by how much you fear it. But the only weight any fear can have is what you give to it when you try to push it away. Risk not "sharing" your burdens. Stop pushing them onto others. You'll be amazed how light they really are.

6. Risk Being Rejected

"No" is just a word; the fear of it is a prophecy self-fulfilled. Be bold! Risk asking for what you really want. Reject the fear of being rejected by daring to say "no" to the fear of "no."

7. Risk Catching Yourself In the Act

Your life can't be both a show and be real. Catch yourself in the middle of some self-created drama and just drop it. Risk bringing the curtain down on yourself. Life is real only when you are.

8. Risk Taking The Lead

You can never know the true pleasure and spiritual satisfaction of having your own life until you take the risk of finding it for yourself, all by yourself. Followers fear to tread that higher inner road called "My Own Way." Risk going out in front.

9. Risk Letting Go

You've been trying to run your own show and, so far, it's pretty much been a nightmare with entertaining intermissions! Risk letting something higher have its hand at directing your life. Let your show go.

10. Risk Being No One

Everyone wants to be seen by others as being great. This makes that kind of greatness common. Be awake to what is common in your life and then risk doing the opposite. Real greatness follows.

The moment of real conscious risk always feels like a tunnel with no light at its other end. But each time you'll choose to enter it, that tunnel will turn into a bridge spanning the space between your past fearful life... and your new fearless one.

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