7 Ways To Make People Feel Important.

I have been reading the Power of Self Discipline recently and it has been quite fascinating. I personally struggle with patience, consistency and relationship with other people. In one of the chapters Brian talks about the 7 ways to make people feel important. This really resonated with me and helped me a lot, so i'd really like to share it here with you.

7 Ways To Make People Feel Important.

When you focus on making other people feel important , you reinforce their self image, increase self esteem and make them feel happy about themselves, and by extension , yourself. Whenever you say, or do, anything to raise the self esteem of the other person ,you trigger a boomerang effect that causes your own self esteem to go up at the same time, and in the same measure.

1 Accept people the way they are , without judgement or evaluation.

2 Show you appreciation for others.

3 Be agreeable. The most welcome people in every situation are those who are generally agreeable and positive with others, on the other hand argumentative people who question , complain and disagree are seldom welcome anywhere. When you nod , smile and agree with another person, when he or she is talking , or expressing an opinion you make that person feel intelligent, respected, valuable and important. When you are agreeable with another person, even if they say something with which you may not be in complete accord, you make that person feel happy to be in your presence.

4. Show your admiration. Express admiration for a persons appearance. Compliment a person traits or characteristics. Compliment a persons accomplishments.

5. Pay attention to others. Listen attentively when they speak.

6. Never criticise, condemn or complain about anything, whether it be directly or indirectly. Never do, or say, anything that lowers a persons self esteem or makes them feel less important or valuable. Refuse to gossip or discuss other people in a negative way.. Never say anything about a person that you would not say to their face.

7. Be courteous, concerned and considerate of everyone you meet. The 3 C's.

Exercise

1. Make a list of the most important friends in your work and personal life. What could you do to make them feel better about themselves?

2. Identify the one things you could do in every meeting or encounter to make the other person feel important.

3. Resolve to make each person feel more valuable & worthwhile because he or she spoke to you.

4. Practice non - judgemental-ism in all your relationships. Always assume the best of intentions on the part of others.

5. Imagine that each person you meet has only a short time to live and you are the only person who knows.

6. Find something about each person that is impressive to you and then tell the other person how impressed you are.

7. Imagine that there is a hidden camera and a microphone recording every interaction you have with other people, how would you behave differently?

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Optimism and Ways to Develop It

Whenever someone has a problem, we say automatically to the person to "look on the brighter side" or "see the cup as half full". Such wise advice may lead the person to shed off negativity. When faced with stressful situations, positive thinking helps us calm down and review the situation in a wider perspective, which can prove to be useful in handling it.

To maintain a positive viewpoint in stressful situations is a mental attitude of optimism. Being optimistic is defined as expecting the best possible outcome from any given situation. Like all psychological traits, optimism is heritable but is strongly influenced by environmental factors, including family environment.

A recent meta-analysis of optimism supported past findings that optimism is positively correlated with life satisfaction, happiness, psychological and physical well-being. Generally, optimists choose lifestyles, which make them lead a healthier life.

Many suggest that optimism is a learn-able behavior. Moreover, it is positively contagious.

The following are some effective ways to develop optimism -

Associate with positive people - Company one keeps closely influences the person. So, surround yourself with people who have positive outlooks. Their positivity will definitely infect you. There goes a saying that if you want to soar with the eagles, you have to stop hanging out with the ducks.

Expect ups and downs - Having a realistic perspective helps prevent things from being blown out of proportion. By maintain an attitude that we all have ups and downs in life, we will be able to face every situation positively. The reality is that life isn't always rainbows and butterflies.

Find an opportunity in difficulty - Optimism means understanding that difficult situations will inevitably appear, often temporarily. It also means that one has ability to combat the challenges that one faces. Optimism implies having a sense of hopefulness that a situation whether good or bad has an inherent opportunity for us to learn from. Remember, the most beautiful rainbows come from the sunlight after a thunderstorm.

Keep positive reminders within range of vision - By writing down short statements that inspire optimism and placing them where one can see them everyday - bathroom mirror, inside of locker and on computer monitor - really helps one maintain positivity.

Work on things that can be controlled - Whenever we land in a situation we think we cannot control, instead of becoming its victim, we should acknowledge the fact. This will prevent us from slipping into pessimism. May be, we find a solution at some point in future if we stay positive. Instead, we should concentrate more on what is under our control.

Practice gratitude - We all have so much good in life, for which we should be thankful. But it is a paradox that we think more about what we don't have as compared to others. Always count your blessings as an old adage goes. This will help frame a better attitude and take your mind off of the negatives.

Appreciate all is impermanent - Nothing is permanent in life that includes everything. However, a current good or bad situation will also change. This belief will kindle optimism in a person.

Focus on the present - We are all obsessed with the past and the future. But, as a matter of fact, life is happening right now. Instead of living in the past and worrying about the future, we should practice living in the present moment.

The trait of optimism is inherently present in all albeit to varying extents. Nonetheless, it is possible for those, who lack the trait, to change their mindset and start thinking more positively. And thus they can reap a whole host of its benefits including improved well-being, lowered stress levels, better relationships and improved quality of life.

Optimism is a trait that makes one look at the sunny side of a situation however bad it may be. An optimist is intrinsically happy because of this special trait. Further, an optimist never fails to affect others with one's positiveness. It is significant to know that optimism is a behavior that can be learned by anyone.

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5 Tips from Billionaires to Help Achieve High Productivity

There are a ton of viral articles out there that are about “habits of millionaires” or“habits of successful people.”

Quite frankly, they are a bit plain and overdone.


5 Billionaire’s Tips to Achieve High Productivity

This advice comes directly from dozens of interviews and books by billionaires I have consumed. I decided to get advice from only the best of the best.

Here are 5 tips from billionaires on how to achieve high productivity:

1. Keep Your Calendar Simple

Keep your calendar clear and organized. Rather than having hundreds of complicated tasks on there, simplify it to the most important. Drop the rest.

The average person has many low-priority tasks that distract them on their calendar. It’s not a good idea to stuff your calendar with a thousand, small random tasks.

Warren Buffett has mentioned this many times in interviews.

Bill Gates has remarked about how amazing this is after learning it from Warren. Bill has used it himself since then.


2. Do What’s Most Important First

Your most important task should be done first when you start the day.

Average people fill their day with unimportant tasks. The start of their day is filled with tasks that could have gone undone and had minimal impact.

By the end of the day, their most important tasks are still incomplete and often pushed off until tomorrow. This leads to further procrastination and small results.

They were busy but not effective or impactful. You don’t want to be the person who does busywork to look busy rather than strategic, smart work.

Warren Buffett’s pilot, Mike Flint, learned this lesson after talking to Buffett.


Mike learned that the biggest threat to finishing the #1 most important task on your list is #2, #3, #4, #5, and so on. Throw out the other tasks until you finish #1.


3. Delegate Lower Priority Tasks

If your time is worth $50 an hour, every hour you waste doing tasks that can be outsourced for much less is a waste of time.

Do you know why billionaires don’t shop for groceries or cook themselves?

Part of the reason is because they can afford to. But according to billionaires like Richard Branson, part of the reason is because it’s an inefficient use of their time.

According to the book 15 Secrets Successful People Know About Time Management: The Productivity Habits of 7 Billionaires, failing to delegate low cost tasks can cost you tons of money.

If your time is worth $1000 an hour, you shouldn’t spend an hour a week buying groceries because you can get the same result in less time and earn more money.

Pay someone $20 an hour to do it for you and spend that time you bought back working. You have now earned $980 after expenses rather than losing an hour doing it yourself without earning anything.

OK, so you might not be making as much as $1000 an hour. But the same thought process can apply to how you spend your time. If your time is worth $25 an hour, how much time are you wasting at work and at home goofing off? 

4. Find Your Peak Performance Environment

People are different. Your most productive environment may be different from someone else’s.

Look for what time of day and what type of surroundings are you most productive in.
For example, some people find that they do the most creative work in loud, crowded coffee shops. Others prefer complete, isolated silence. Some people are most alert and focused in the mornings, while others do better late at night.

Build your environment and schedule to fit your optimal levels of performance.


5. Plan Out What You Will Do

According to the book, top performing billionaires plan out what they will do next ahead of time.

Plan out what you will do tomorrow and the next week. You can save hours of time by working more efficiently from the plans you made.

Without proper planning, your disorganization will cost you efficient moments of optimal workflow.

You’ll be confused and unsure of what to do. You’ll spend extra time trying to figure out what’s more important. You will be dazzled if you get interrupted and unsure where to resume.


Conclusion

There should be no excuses. Anyone is capable of turning these productivity tips into habits. I think the reasons people don’t are the lack of awareness and laziness.

Remember to keep your calendar simple, do what’s most important first, delegate lower priority tasks, find your best environment, and plan out what you will do next.
Are you as productive as a billionaire? Leave a comment below.

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20 Life Lessons Learned in 20 Years of Life

The first 20 years of our lives are crazy.

We grow from helpless little babies to educated adults with a heavy degree of responsibility. Within these first 20 years are hundreds of first experiences, pains, growths, laughs, wonders, that slowly begin to shape our lives for the future, and there are many life lessons learned along the way.

The mindset that people begin to create for themselves during these years can waver greatly, and either push them towards what they want, or gradually away from it. As humans we are most susceptible to drastic changes, which begs the point of this article.

20 Life Lessons Learned in 20 Years of Life


1) People’s actions are affected more by what they want to hear, rather than what they actually hear.

What I mean by this is that people act very rashly based on what they wanted to hear, rather than acting correctly on the things they actually hear. This is the case for many different scenarios, and causes people to take various actions towards things that push them in the wrong direction.

The reason for this is because as humans it’s natural for us to want things our own way. Which leads to us not taking in feedback correctly, or not being able to accept compliments sometimes when they’re given to us.


2) Being different is important. Trying to be someone else can destroy any unique talent that you have.

As people grow up, they want to fit in with others. They want to make new and cool friends to spend their time with, and as a result copying others becomes a natural thing for people to do, especially if they’ve been made fun of for doing something different before.

Being different is not a detriment. Being different is important in order to stand out and make sure you live your life doing what you love. This is the second of my 20 best life lessons learned within 20 years of life.

A lot of people think their search for happiness will be over once they ditch being different and start fitting in with everyone else. But the key to happiness is to do what you love no matter what, and learn to be proud of everything that makes you different.


3) Time can be both your best friend and worst enemy. How you use it is critical.

Time is something we think we have endless amounts of, in our early years of life in particular.

So the general pattern is that we spend a lot of time lounging around, not doing too much, just ‘chilling’, for the first half of our lives. Then for the second half we feel like there’s so much left that we still want to do, but we don’t have time for. Use your time wisely.

Time can also be our best friend because of the fact that it allows things to nurture. If you feel like you’re giving everything 100% but you’re still not heading upwards, give it time.


It apparently takes around 10,000 hours to become successful, but I think that’s a pretty loose definitive depending on what your definition of success is.


4) When you finish education, the talented start to get overtaken by the hardworking.

When we’re growing up, the majority of us will receive a fairly good education, and some brains will develop more quickly than others. Since we’re receiving the same education for the most part, it’s not difficult for talented people to stand out.

They may not be that hardworking, but their talented and with the same number of hours in the class room, they get pretty good results.

Although, when we finish education and get released into the big wide world of work, talent alone won’t make people a success unless there’s hard work accompanied with it. Hardworking people tend to overtake people who are just simply talented if they don’t put in the same amount of hard work.


5) Everybody has the capability of dreaming and achieving, but most people do not attempt to achieve what they dream.

Most people often think that they can happily dream about everything they want in life, but still believe it will never be achievable. And for this reason, some people never even attempt to achieve their dreams.

6) Anything ever worth achieving does not come easy. Hard work is the key to everything.

This is one of my most important life lessons learned in the past couple of years. Nowadays people are led astray so often by the promise of opportunities that give the same results, but are are quicker and easier to achieve.

“Get rich quick”, “20 minute abs”, they have it all.

These are false promises made to reel people in from the attractive guarantees. 90% of the people that purchase these books or programs fail to accomplish what the book promises, and the other 10% are not just relying solely those schemes to get what they want.


7) The majority of situations can be improved, if you’re willing to drop all the excuses you tell yourself first.

We all have excuses for something: “I don’t have time”, or “it’s impossible, it can’t be done”, but pretty much every excuse you tell yourself or hear from someone is not reality.

It’s a way of giving themselves a reason as to why they can’t do something, in order to clear their conscience. If you’re in a situation at the moment and you want it to change for the better, that can happen if you’re willing to drop every excuse you like to tell yourself.


8) Connecting with like-minded people is the quickest way to developing yourself into the person you want to be.

Jim Rohn says you become like the 5 people you hang out with most. The point is that hanging out with like-minded people is the best of developing yourself into the person you want to become, because they’re on the same journey as you and can share their knowledge.

Truly one of my best life lessons learned within the past year. Let go of the negative friends and hang around with like-minded people!


9) Never turn your back on people who have always supported you.

Loyal friends and family that love and support you, should always know how much you appreciate them. Considering that loyal friends are pretty hard to find nowadays, it’s stupid to neglect those that already support you.

10) The first 20 years of your life build the foundation for the rest.

As I briefly pointed out earlier, our lives for the first 20 years are crazy. The rapid growth and self-development we go through during this time is phenomenal, and whichever routes we choose to go down during this time can, more often than not, stick.

Not only because we’re more susceptible to things like peer pressure and other influences, but because our brains develop and adapt at a much quicker rate during this time than they do at adulthood.

The route you decide to take during this period can have a large effect on the rest of your life. How will you build your foundation?


11) To create something your truly proud of takes time. Your vision always has the potential to become reality.

Ever since I was a child, I was obsessed with creativity and design. Patterns, drawing, creating something that just kept on improving; that was what I craved.

To this day, I still look for ways I can create something I’m passionate about, and consistently improve it over time. Then look back at the original creation and realize just how terrible it was.

The point of this, is that your first idea or vision for something big may seem like the best it could ever be, but only time can reveal whether you were right or not. As time progresses, so does your knowledge and your creativity.

Ideas only get better over time.

12) Peer pressure is a test of your will. Strong will is essential for success.

One of the hardest life lessons learned, and hardest thing to overcome growing up, is peer pressure. What with people trying to fit in with others, and just be like everyone else, some find this impossible to avoid.

Back in high school, pretty much every one of my friends started smoking, and I was one of the only ones to not take it up. I would go outside with them whenever they went out for one, but I wouldn’t smoke with them.

I had no desire to instantly become popular by starting something that personally I wouldn’t get anything from.

The nature of this life lesson is that strong will is important for succeeding in life. Because whenever anybody tell you “no, it’s impossible, you should just give up”, and they try to put negative thoughts in your head; your will determines which side you end up on.


13) Anybody who sets out to make a big impact or go against the grain will receive some level of hate.

The thing with trying to have a big impact on the world, is that everybody is different and in a world of free speech, opinions will always be mixed.

The more publicity you start to receive for whatever it may be that you’re trying to accomplish, the more people that will possibly have something bad to say about it. It’s unavoidable. So don’t be afraid to go against the grain, and make a difference in the world.


14) Many people think they have the option to either live and die young or live elderly and die without truly living.

The two options people think they have in life is to either live and die young; meaning do whatever they want before they take up a boring job that they hate. Or to live elderly and die without truly living; meaning they work hard and become successful, but don’t have all the fun experiences they can whilst they’re young.

The options you have are the ones that you create for yourself. The majority of people will probably believe that they have to choose one of the above, but this isn’t the case. You can live your life however you want to live it.

15) Things aren’t just naturally attracted to you. It’s up to you to make the first move.

Naturally, we think that if we work hard and take care of ourselves, opportunities will present themselves. The fact is that opportunities only present themselves if you make the first move.

You should go up to that girl, you should contact that company, you should reach out to people, you should ask for training.

Waiting for opportunities to come to me is not a game I like to play. Number 15 is one the best life lessons learned in my life.

16) Trees can’t be chopped down without persistence. Only after so many hits in the same spot will it be brought down.

One of my favourite sayings that I once heard in an Eric Thomas speech, is that if you hit a tree with an axe a thousand times in a thousand different places, you won’t bring it down. But if you take that axe and you hit that tree a thousand times in the same spot, you’ll bring the tree down.

Persistence is the key to improvement. Whether it’s with a girl who you thinks playing hard to get, a business that can’t quite get off the ground, or a quest for building muscle mass that is going far slower than first expected. Persistence is the key.


17) It’s better to act and be embarrassed for five minutes, than to not act and be embarrassed for the rest of your life.

Back when I was in school, I was afraid of asking questions. I wouldn’t do it in case the question was stupid and people felt compelled to laugh at me.

But since then, I’ve realised that asking those questions would have helped me out a great deal, and it’s better to be embarrassed for 5 minutes and gain that knowledge, rather than never ask and be embarrassed by how little you know in the future.

18) You don’t have to follow the crowd just because it seems sensible.

The general pattern when leaving school is to go on to university or college, but it’s not a must. So many people are leaving uni with the same degrees, that when it comes to getting a job none of them stand out compared to a guy who’s had some incredible real life experience.

You don’t have to follow the crowd just because it seems like the most sensible thing to do. Remember, it’s good to be different.


19) The best form of learning is outside of school.

School education is a general form of learning that has to be applicable for every child. Nothing about it is tailored to what you want to do in life, and it doesn’t give you any in action training.

Going out of your way whilst in education and even after to progress your knowledge in subjects your passionate about, is something you absolutely must do. The education system can only get you so far.


20) Above all, never give up on what you believe is possible.

The last of the life lessons Learned in the past 20 years of my life, is to never give upon what you believe is possible. No matter how much you feel like you’re up against it, if you truly believe it’s possible, you can get it done.


Before you go, do you have any life lessons learned in recent years of your life you’d like to add?

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The Formula for Letting Go

One of the worst ways of spending your day is worrying about something. Whether it’s troubles with money, a fight with a loved one, feeling guilty for something, it doesn’t matter. As long as your mind fixates on worrying about a certain topic, it just ruins your entire day. You can’t focus on anything else and it eats away at you, and the only solution for that is something that’s much easier said than done: letting go.

Everyone tells you to “let it go” when you’re feeling stressed about something, but almost nobody tells you how to let it go, and it’s not easy at all. Usually you try for a few minutes and realise that, if you could, you would have a long time ago. With that in mind, my goal with this post is to explain how you can take those troubles out of your head and enjoy the rest of your day.

First, I’ll show you my formula for letting go and then I’ll explain every aspect of it. Ready? Here it goes.
Can you do anything about what’s troubling you?

Yes = Do it
No = Accept that

I know it seems overly simplistic, but it’s a clear way of remembering the mindset you must have when faced with stressful situations. Let’s dive into it and figure out all the details.
Is There Anything You Can Do?

First of all, you can see that it’s very important to analyze whether you have any control over your troubles or not, because that will determine what you can do about them. If you’re stressed about the results of your job interview, then there’s nothing you can do about it but wait. If you’re feeling guilty because you didn’t work out the entire week, you can simply go to the gym and work out right now to mitigate that.

The problem is, most of the time, we don’t care whether we have control over our problems or not. We worry and worry as if it’s going to change anything, and then feel bad because it didn’t. When you stop and think about how much you can do in this situation, it starts to make that burden lighter because you start focusing on what you can do. You turn your attention to actions instead of feelings.

Once you ask yourself that question, your mindset changes. It puts you in a more logical and analytical position, which is what you need to counter that emotionally charged mindset of worrying about money or relationships, for example. With that said and done, let’s take a look at your options.
If Your Answer Is Yes

If there is something you can do about your situation, you need to figure out what it is. This will force you to accept that you either have to take action or deal with the fact that you put yourself in that position. If you can do something but won’t, you run out of excuses to keep worrying about it.

Let’s say you have a very important exam in a week and you’re feeling stressed. Can you do something about it? Yes, you can study. Now if you decide to study, you can stop feeling guilty or stressed because you are doing your part. Since all the rest isn’t in your control, your best bet is to understand that by doing your part you are giving yourself permission to not worry about it anymore. Feelings aren’t rational and chances are you’ll still feel stressed about it, but your best chance at mitigating that feeling is trying to be rational with yourself. We like to be consistent as human beings so if you show your mind that you’ve done what you could, it’ll be much easier to accept that there’s no need to worry.

However, if you can study but won’t, then you have to deal with that decision. Feeling guilty about it won’t change anything, and you’ve made your mind. In either case you need to get to a definitive answer so you can be at peace. Here you have to accept that you chose not to take action and that’s the end of the story. Put all of this in rational terms so you don’t let your emotions take over. You could do something but you won’t? Fine, then so be it. Accept that and realize that feeling guilty or worrying won’t change the fact that you won’t take action. If you know you won’t study until the night before the test, then accept that and forget about it until the day comes. If you find you can’t forget about it, then study. Whatever you choose, the only way you’ll be at peace is by giving closure to your worries. Do it or don’t, but put an end to it in your mind.
If Your Answer Is No

Now if you can’t do anything about it, it’s a very different story. When the answer was ‘yes’ you had control over certain aspects of your situation. In this case, you most likely feel powerless. It’s one thing to choose not to act and another entirely to not be able to act.

Going back to the exam situation, let’s say you took it and feel you didn’t do well. What can you do about it? Realistically, nothing. Your teacher will grade your exam and all you can do is wait for the results.

This is stressful because you fear the consequences of not doing well on your test, but you feel powerless because it’s too late to study more and you can’t retake it. The key is to understand that there’s nothing you can do, and worrying won’t change that. Although not being in control might seem like a burden, it can actually be your ticket to freedom.

Once you realize that there’s nothing you can do and that being stressed won’t change anything, the only option is letting go. If you’re able to make your mind see the rational side of it, it’ll be easier to realize that all you can do is forget about it until the results come in.

Now I know all of this is very difficult to achieve. Like I said at the beginning: easier said than done, right? But it’s still vital that we understand how this whole ‘letting go’ process should work. In order to help you actually achieve that, let’s take a look at some strategies that might help.
Strategies To Stop Worrying

Whenever we’re worried about something, it’s because we fear the consequences. There wouldn’t be a reason to be concerned with your exams if the grades didn’t stop you from passing the classes, and money wouldn’t be a problem if you didn’t need it to survive. We focus on the problems that might arise and get anxious before anything even happens.

One way of easing that pain is by doing some smart thinking on these very consequences. We have a tendency to exaggerate what would happen if things went wrong, which is one of the reasons why we worry so much. When you look back, you’ll see most of your worries never came to be and were probably much more dramatic than what could have happened. This quote (usually attributed to Mark Twain) captures that feeling pretty well:

“I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.”

Challenge your mind to give you concrete reasons to worry so much about everything, and you might just realise your worries might not be justified.

Now if your worries are justified, think about how big the consequences actually are. As I’ve said above, most of our fears are blown out of proportion. The best way to deal with that is by going through what would be the worst case scenario, how you would get out of it, and what is most likely to happen.

The point here is that we always find a way out, so if you force yourself to actually go through how bad the worst case scenario would be and how you would overcome it, your mind is getting used to the idea that no matter what happens, you can turn this around. It’s also a way of showing you that the consequences are usually much smaller than we make them out to be. Didn’t get the mark you needed to pass a subject in high school? You’ll do it next year; it doesn’t matter at all in the big scheme of things. Lost your life savings in an economic crash? Of course that’s much much worse, but you know you’ll survive this. There’s always a graver situation that’s been overcome before. You know you’ll find a way no matter what happens.

Letting go is about determining whether you can do something or not, and then acting on that information. It’s also about realising that our problems are much more manageable than we tend to realise. In the end, people who are at peace and comfortable with letting go understand that 90% of what we worry about doesn’t matter in the slightest. Once we focus on what is truly important, it becomes harder and harder to care about all the small annoyances of life.

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10 Daily Affirmations to Energise and Inspire You

The Morning Cycle: Anxiety, Dread, Negativity


“The only pressure I’m under is the pressure I’ve put on myself.”

Mark Messier

I would go to bed every night promising myself that everything will be okay and that my life is generally pretty good and that I’m reasonably successful. I’d remind myself of all the wonderful things that are happening and how grateful I should feel.

Then morning would come, as it always does, and I’d wake up with anxiety and dread. I would have a dozen terrible thoughts running through my head and literally feel heavy from the weight of these thoughts while still laying in bed! (Do thoughts actually have weight? I’m betting the negative ones do!)

Even before I’d rouse myself to start a new day and see what actually transpires, my thoughts had already made up stories that scared me to even face the day.

What if I have a car accident (one of my worst fears)? What if I have a disease I don’t know about? What if I lose someone I love today? What if this or that awful thing comes to be, what am I to do?

And on and on these negative thoughts would circulate my head as I showered and dressed and got ready for my day. I would wear a fake smile, look all happy and smart on the outside, and go about my day, feeling anything but peaceful.

By mid day, the morning’s anxious thoughts would dissipate and the busyness of the day would take over, but I’d be physically depleted from fighting this war in my head every single morning.

How I Found My Way out of Negativity

Then a few years ago, I stumbled upon something called “positive affirmations“, these first-person present-tense mantras or statements that you repeat over and over to cultivate a positive calm state of mind.

The skeptic in me poked fun at affirmations for the longest time, but the curiosity was thankfully stronger so I gave them a try. Every day, I’d start repeating three simple affirmations before even getting out of bed.

“I am feeling strong and healthy today. I am grateful and happy for my life. I trust myself.”

I did this for a week and let’s just say, by the end of that week, I could no longer justifiably make fun of positive affirmations! They worked miracles in my mind.

So I’m here to tell you today that you are not alone.

If you wake up with anxiety and stress, you are not alone.

If you think of all that could go wrong before the day has even started, you are not alone.

If your first thoughts in the morning are not peaceful, you are not alone.

Millions of people wake up with stress and anxiety every day. Science and medicine has researched and proven the harmful effects of negative thoughts and stress.

Stress and anxiety can have serious negative long-term effects on your physical health, your mental well being, your relationships, your job performance, your finances and your opportunities in life. Don’t let it do that to you!

Ready to heal your negativity?

“If you realised how powerful your thoughts are, you would never think a negative thought.” – Peace Pilgrim

You know the worst part? Most people don’t ever learn that changing their thoughts is within their complete power. So they remain slaves to their own thoughts – most of which are negative.

It turns out that you can choose your thoughts and if you can choose, then choose positive thoughts. It is a skill that you can develop at any age and stage in your life.

You have the brainpower, the smarts, and all the tools that you need to decide which thoughts you allow and which ones you forbid. It’s marvellous really when you get the hang of it.

The most effective tool to use to direct the right thoughts in and the wrong ones out is daily affirmations. When you learn how to incorporate daily affirmations into your life, first, you become aware.

You become aware of your thoughts and of what is going on in your head. You become aware of your natural tendency to think negative thoughts in certain (or most) situations.

Awareness helps you identify when the patterns are happening so that you can then use affirmations to reverse such patterns.

With the power of daily affirmations, the energy flow of your thoughts changes. You will infuse more positive energy into your mind and become aware of the potential negative energy surrounding you.

10 Daily Affirmations to Memorise Now


“I am safe. All is well. Everything comes to me at the right time.” ~Louise Hay

If daily tools are not quick and easy to use, we’re not likely to stick with them even if the benefits are huge. That’s why I pulled together a list of only 10 short and easy-to-memorise daily affirmations that are both effective and energising in helping you feel inner peace and excitement. It is best to say these first thing in the morning. Repeat each affirmation three times and do this for one week to start getting results.
I am enough.
I wake up happy and productive.
I accept my true identity.
I trust myself and my decisions.
I love and approve of myself.
I am worthy of happiness and respect.
I bring great energy to all things I do.
My body is healing itself all the time.
Gratitude is my default emotion in all things.
My life serves a purpose.

I included mostly first-person affirmations, because they’re generally the simplest ones to start with. You can memorise the list in pairs at first. Memorise two then another two and then keep adding. Or you can pick and choose your favourite affirmations from the list and only use those.

Remember: You are important. You are capable. You are smart. And you are worthy of love and happiness. Your thoughts may lie to you until you start to drive the negative thoughts out and focus on the positive ones. Affirmations can help you do this and much more. Give yourself another chance. Let affirmations be the start of your happiness now.

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4 Ways to Amplify Your Confidence

Lack of confidence can be a tough thing to contend with. It can prevent us going for what we want, make social interactions a challenge and leave us feeling lost, frustrated and stuck. There are things we can do to build our confidence though – it’s often not something that just comes naturally! Some things can be implemented in an instant whereas others take a little more time.

As an introvert, confidence (or lack of it) is something I have had to deal with in life. Though actually, even the most outgoing people can lack confidence in many ways too. Confidence is unique to every person, regardless of their personality. For me, it still unveils its face in some situations but here are 4 things that I have done (and still do) to overcome it.

What’s the worst that could happen?

Whenever I feel like my lack of confidence is stopping me taking a bold step or doing something I really want to do, I pull out the ‘what is the worst that could happen?‘ card. That gives me the exact perspective I need to do it anyway. And in all cases, the worst thing (which is never that bad!) never happens. In fact, I usually feel great at the fact I pushed past the fear. And then I remember that feeing for next time!


Big changes come from taking small steps.

If you lack confidence in an area, what little thing can you do to push yourself just slightly out of your comfort zone without completely overwhelming yourself? As an example, if you struggle with confidence socially around other people, challenge yourself every day for a week to smile at 3 people you don’t know. It doesn’t sound like a big deal but can give you a real confidence boost to know you have instigated that subtle interaction. Plus, you’ll likely make the days of 3 people!

Get good at what you want to be confident in.

Confidence when it comes to doing something well usually doesn’t come completely naturally. To anyone! Think about those people you know who are confident in their work. The chances are they’ve practiced or nurtured the skills they need to get really good at what they do. Or musicians or public speakers. They may have raw talent but endless hours will have been spent perfecting their craft so that they can get up and do their thing with absolute conviction and confidence. Even people who seem to ooze confidence socially have probably practiced it! So what practical steps can you take to get good at an area that you want more confidence in?


Don’t beat yourself up over it.

For me personally, this is the most important lesson I’ve learned. Ultimately it’s that inner confidence that provides the core foundation to then build upon. And that comes from self-acceptance. I spent most of my twenties in a battle with myself and my confidence as a consequence, was at an all time low. I couldn’t really see a way forward or find my confidence because I didn’t know who I was. I lost my passion for everything. After working through this, the natural confidence I have cultivated now really comes from just letting go. Letting go of fear of what people think, fear of failure, fear of fun, even! By taking care of myself, doing the things I love, going for what I want in my career, laughing, spending time with people who bring out the best in me and constantly pushing myself in a positive way to do more, with that has come self acceptance and confidence.

There are many situations in which we may have to ‘put on’ confidence and that’s normal. But really, the end goal I think, is having that true, authentic inner confidence. And that comes when you amp up the self-care, do things that make you feel on top of the world and not be afraid to let your true, fantastic and completely unique personality shine through.

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Organization Tips: Cleaning Up Your Workspace And Your Calendar

A lot of people think that being an entrepreneur means that I can do anything I want, anytime I want. While it’s true that I don’t have a boss who dictates my schedule, that doesn’t mean I’m just free-floating all the time—as an entrepreneur, I have learned to have a lot of self-discipline and to be very organized in my business and my life. So today I’m sharing with you some of my favorite organization tips. Your business can only grow to its full potential if your space and your time are clearly organized—I hope these tips help you clear the clutter and maximize your potential!

DESIGNATE A PLACE FOR EVERYTHING

Time is money, as they say, and having an organized space will save you time. If you don’t take 10 seconds to put something in its proper place, you might lose 10 minutes looking all over for it later. When I complete a project for my DIY business, I don’t call it a day until each tool is put back into its designated space and the workshop is clean. In those moments, I’m often tired and ready to relax at that point in the day, but I motivate myself by imagining how inviting my workshop will be when I set to work on my next project—and how much time (and, therefore, money!) I’m saving in the long run.

LOOK AT YOUR SPACE THROUGH SOMEONE ELSE’S EYES

Schedule frequent meetings at your workspace, whether that’s a home office, a rented space, or a workshop. Knowing that you’ll have regular visitors will force you to keep it orderly. When we’re the only one using our space, we have a tendency to become “blind” to dirt and clutter that might accumulate over time. But as soon as someone else comes by, we suddenly see what’s overflowing or out of place. Use this fact to your advantage by regularly inviting clients and colleagues to meet with you at your workspace—the pressure to have a clean, hospitable space will compel you to keep things organized.

TRY OUT THE KONMARI METHOD

If your space really needs an overhaul, I highly recommend picking up Marie Kondo’s The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up. This unlikely bestseller has taken the U.S. by storm and, after finally having a look at it myself, I can understand why. Kondo’s “KonMari Method” of organization involves radically purging your home or workspace of anything that does not “spark joy.” While this criterion might seem strange for organizing an office space, its basic premise of getting rid of anything that’s not serving a purpose seems right on target. The extreme purge takes time—Kondo recommends laying everything out and methodically putting back only what you need—but it is time well spent if, as she argues, you’ll never need to do it again!

KNOW WHERE YOU’RE GOING—AND PARK ON A DOWNHILL SLOPE

The first three tips dealt with organizing our space; now let’s turn to how we manage our time. I force myself to make a plan in advance for each day and WRITE IT DOWN. If my plan for the next day (or at least for the first half of the day) is written down in my planner, then I don’t have to think about it for the rest of the evening. I can relax knowing that my instructions will be there waiting for me when I wake up. Sometimes I even make a point of stopping short of completing a particular task the day before so that I can begin the next day by picking up where I left off. Productivity experts call this “parking on a downhill slope,” and it can really help you start the day off with some momentum.

TURN A TO-DO LIST INTO A TO-DO SCHEDULE

A list is designed to be added to, so it can make it hard to feel satisfaction if you’re adding as much as your checking off. To remedy this, try turning your to-do list into a to-do schedule. When I consult my calendar at the start of each week, I write in my to-do’s alongside my scheduled appointments. If I assign an actual time to a task, I am far more likely to actually get that task done. Having a to-do schedule has taught me to be much more realistic about how much I can get done in a given time. Sometimes it means not having time for everything on the to-do list, but it’s better to know that in advance than feel disappointed at the end of the week. With this method, I’ve found that not only am I getting more done but also I’m more tuned in to my schedule and can therefore say yes or no to new projects with much more confidence.

PUT YOUR SCHEDULE WHERE YOU AND OTHERS CAN SEE IT

Put your important appointments/tasks on a shared, visible calendar where everyone else who matters can see it (family members, coworkers, roommates…). If you make your schedule and goals “public” in this way, you can avoid scheduling conflicts. You’ll also be more likely to complete tasks on time, because others can hold you accountable. You might share your schedule digitally, via a Google calendar or other shared site, but you can also go the try-and-true dry erase marker route. For home use, I got a magnetic wipe-off calendar from The Board Dudes with a set of markers so I can color-code based on category or person. For the office, I like their bigger and more professional-looking glass wipe-off calendar—it’ll keep you organized, give you a highly visible place to write down goals and important reminders, and look sleek if clients or collaborators come by.

STICK TO A SYSTEM

Don’t be fickle. I love organizational tools, but sometimes they work against me because I get so excited about the newest app or planner that I don’t stick with one long enough to really reap its benefits. The most important thing about an organizational system is not if it’s pen-and-paper or digital, or if it’s got flashy new bells and whistles—the most important thing is that you stick to it. So do a little bit of research to decide what approach might be best for you, and then hurry up and start using it!

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