Teach People How To Treat You Better!

According to Dr. Phil, "We teach people how to treat us." Let that sink in for a moment. Rephrase it and repeat it a couple times to yourself. "I teach people how to treat me." Maybe you're thinking, my life isn't perfect and maybe once in a while an argument gets heated, but I'm doing alright.

But think for a moment about how people really do treat you. How does your spouse or significant other talk to you or about you? Do you feel supported and like you are both on the same team? What about your dad? Your ex? Do you walk on eggshells or tip toe around certain issues to avoid an argument? Think about nicknames people use for you, is there one you don't really like but you just let it go?

Are there things that any of them say that are a little on the edge of being rude? How do you react when this happens? Do you stop it, leave the room as if you didn't hear it, or just keep quiet? They may call you "big mama" referring to your extra weight but they frame it as "an inside joke". Do you laugh with them? Or do you ask them not to use that reference for you again?

What about your children? How do they talk to you? How do they behave toward you? Do they yell at you, try to hit you, push, ignore you, or kick at you when they don't get their way? Do you chalk this up to "just a tantrum" or do you discipline them for it? Do they show appreciation or just demand or expect you to cook, clean, and drive them to/from activities?

Think about other people in your life such as co-workers, friends, and relatives. Maybe they joke about "you and your book smarts", refer to your "hillbilly" accent, comment that you "run or throw like a girl", or ask "when are you going to just get a real job?" How do you respond? Does it feel like your co-workers or your boss value your contributions? Have you been corrected or yelled at by a boss or co-worker in front of other employees or customers?

As you think about how each of these types of people treat you, try to identify any patterns between them. For example, do both your husband and your in-laws make fun of the type of job that you have? Is there a running joke with your in-laws and your friends about your house being featured on the next TV episode of Hoarders or How Clean is your House?

Or maybe you have a friend or several friends that seem to imply that being a stay at home mom is not important or the fact that you work full-time and have your kids in daycare is not right. Maybe it's a co-worker who rolls their eyes every time you get a phone call from your kids who are at home.

Does this mean you are to blame for people treating you badly? Absolutely not. You are only responsible for what you knew when you knew it. And each person is ultimately responsible for their own behavior. But the good news is that now that you do know, you absolutely can teach most people how to treat you better!

The way that you teach people how to respect you or in some cases teach people how to treat you better is by first creating a very clear picture for yourself about what kind of behavior or treatment you will accept, how you express this to others, and how you respond if the poor treatment continues.

In order to set clear limits about how others treat you, it's important for you to first commit to some firm guidelines about how YOU treat yourself and others. The better you get at taking care of yourself, the harder it will be for you to tolerate disrespect from others. You also have to treat others well. The old adage, "do unto others as you would have them do unto you" should be your new mantra.

We teach people how to treat us, yes. But that doesn't mean that everyone who behaves badly toward us is an evil person. They may not even be aware of how their treatment makes you feel. And you definitely contribute to that if you don't let them know how their behavior impacts you. They don't know what they don't know either. And if they do know they are hurting you, all the more reason for you to put a stop to it now.

So now that you know you can teach people to treat you better, the next step is to learn more about how to set firm boundaries and how to express yourself in an assertive way. With a little practice, you will be able to send a clear message to folks that you respect yourself and won't allow anyone to violate that in the way they treat you. There are several ways you can learn to set boundaries and stand up for yourself including self-help books, community education classes, or by getting the help of a life coach who specializes in this area. Contact us today!

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Three Keys To Personal Power

There are three personality powers that top leaders use to increase their personal power and influence.

Your Emotions Are Contagious
The first power you can develop is enthusiasm. The more excited you are about accomplishing something that is important to you, the more excited others will be about helping you to do it. The fact is that emotions are contagious. The more passion you have for your life and your activities, the more charisma you will possess, and the more cooperation you will gain from others. Every great man or woman has been totally committed to a noble cause and, as a result, has attracted the support and encouragement of others in many cases, thousands or millions of others.

The Key to CharismaThe second personality power that you can develop is expertise, or competence. The more knowledgeable you are perceived to be in your field, the more charisma you will have among those who respect and admire that knowledge because of the impact it can have on their lives. This is also the power of excellence, of being recognized by others as an outstanding performer in your field. Men and women who do their jobs extremely well and who are recognized for the quality of their work are those who naturally attract the help and support of others. They have charisma. 

Prepare Thoroughly for Every Event
The third power of personality that gives you charisma in the eyes of others is thorough preparation, detailed preparation, prior to undertaking any significant task. Whether you are calling on a prospect, meeting with your boss, giving a public talk or making any other kind of presentation, when you are well-prepared, it becomes clear to everyone. The careers of many young people are put onto the fast track as a result of their coming to an important meeting after having done all their homework.

Get on Top of Your Subject
Whether it takes you hours or even days, if an upcoming meeting or interaction is important, take the time to get on top of your subject. Be so thoroughly prepared that nothing can faze you. Think through and consider every possibility and every ramification. Often, this effort to be fully prepared will do more to generate the respect of others than anything else you can do.

Keep Good NotesRemember that the power is always on the side of the person who has done the most preparation and has the best notes. Everything counts. Leave nothing to chance. When you do something related to your work or career, take the time to do it right the first time.

You are a work in progress. You are always growing and improving. Your job is to become the very best leader you can be, and you can – with regular and persistent practice of these personality powers.

Action Exercises
Here are two things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action.

First, get excited about your goals and your work if you want others to be excited. Express your belief and commitment to others at every opportunity.

Second, dedicate yourself to a lifelong process of getting better and better at what you do. Prepare thoroughly for every event. Set an example in everything you do.

We'd love to meet you. Why not join our FREE private Facebook Community at www.masteringsuccess.group

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8 Daily Challenges to Quickly Turn Your Life Around

If you currently feel like your life isn’t going the way you want it to, and you’re struggling to wake up every morning, knowing that what you’ve got going for right now is not to be looked forward to, then this is for you.

Here are 8 daily challenges for yourself, in order to quickly turn your life around at 30 years old, 40 years old, it doesn’t matter how old you are.

1) Stop watching T.V

As Bill Gates once said, “T.V is not real life”. Sometimes I think that people spend more time focused on what’s going on in the fictional world of Television, rather than their own life.

It just doesn’t make sense. Sure it’s a good thing to relax and T.V has that entertainment value to which you can relax to, but when it starts to overtake your own life, that’s worrying. Life is precious. Focus on your own personal stuff that you’ve got going on, and don’t get caught up in the world of Television.

The people you’re looking at on your T.V get paid to act, and they most likely love what they do. You can’t get lost in the world with them because they’re the ones who aren’t wasting any time.


2) Never stop looking for new opportunities

Some people find a job that they’re relatively happy with, apply, go for an interview, get the job and then stop looking for anything better. Once they get themselves a job, they can’t see a reason to keep looking for others. Why would they need to? They have a job now.

But what if there’s a better, more suitable job out there, that you just haven’t spotted yet. One that you’d absolutely love, rather than just mildly enjoy. If you stop looking, you’ll never spot it.

Never stop looking for new opportunities, because that’s how you end up becoming stuck in a rut, that you just can’t get out of. There may not be any more opportunities for you if you forget to look for even a short while.


3) Become an early riser

You should know by now that becoming an early riser is a very powerful way to change your life. Going from waking up at 11am, to waking up at 5:30, is an incredible difference. 5 hours and 30 minutes to be precise. Just think how much more can be achieved in that time.

That’s enough time to start your own business or project on the side, as well as having a full time job. And if you still think it’s not, you must be tripping. There are so many people who have managed to get out of the 9-5 grind by getting up early and working on their own thing before heading to the office to do some work for somebody else.

Even if you don’t want to wake up early for that particular reason, it gives you time to workout, process your thoughts, get things ready for the day, relax a little, you name it.

No, it won’t be easy at first. Which is why I recommend you start by setting that alarm for half an hour earlier, then repeat that gradually over a few weeks, and soon you’ll be waking up earlier without even having to think twice.

4) If you know what you want, go after it

Why is it that sometimes when we see things we want, we don’t go for them? Or we don’t put in as much effort as we could be doing? I’m sure that there’s been a few times where you’ve seen something incredible, an amazing opportunity that you know you want, but you carry on walking as if it was nothing.

I’m talking about a new career, or a new relationship, some sort of unique opportunity that just shouldn’t be passed up. The reason is usually always because we’re scared. We’re scared of putting a lot of time and effort into something that just might not work out.

This is a terrible mistake. If things don’t work out, you accept it, learn from it and move on.

The negative risks involved are perceived by us to be worse than they actually are. And the possible positive outcome that you’re giving up… can you really afford to pass by it and not take a second glance?

5) Challenge yourself mentally

Mental challenges on a daily basis are important if you are to grow as a person, and in your chosen field of expertise. How do you expect your brain to ever adapt if you’re not giving it a big enough challenge that will push it in that direction.

If you have this dream job that you just can’t quite seem to get right now, don’t keep waiting until the next interview. Challenge yourself mentally on a daily basis that’ll allow you to progress your knowledge on the subject and ultimately give you better chances of succeeding with your dreams.


6) Make 5 new connections a day

You know the old saying, “It’s not what you know, but who you know”? Well that’s definitely the case in many circumstances, but it doesn’t matter because making new connections is just so easy.


7) Read, watch and follow motivational speakers

I don’t know if you read a lot of books from life coaches, motivational speakers and such, or watch their videos. But you should be doing so. Watching videos on YouTube is not a waste of time if their motivating you and providing you with better understandings of life.

If you’re not sure who you should be following, then check out Tony Robbins, Zig Ziglar, Eric Thomas & Les Brown. That should get you started for now. There are plenty more to come. Watch their videos, read their books, take in their wisdom.

8) Appreciate what you’ve got before it’s gone

Lastly, appreciate what you’ve got on a daily basis, before it’s gone. Change the way you look at things. You may be sitting there, feeling sorry for yourself, feeling like you have nothing to live for, and it’s partially because you’re not realising and being appreciative of what you already have.

Family, a roof over your head, food, water, a freaking internet connection.

Change the way you look at things and be more appreciative of what you have. Don’t take things for granted and you’ll already be feeling happier… because happiness is a choice. You could be living in a bad neighbourhood on a low income, in bad shape and by yourself, but still have a peaceful and happy life.

It doesn’t matter whether you want to turn your life around at 30 years old or 50 years old, just give the above challenges a shot and make a change in your life!

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10 Ways Reading Enhances Personal Development

As a tween, I loved the Nancy Drew Mystery Series. I wanted to be like Nancy Drew. She had such a good head on her shoulders, even though she was constantly facing danger and never quite “hooking” Ned, the handsome guy whom the wealthy beautiful Helen was always throwing herself upon.

Through those characters, I was able to gain insight into the types of people I encountered in my daily life – character types – good, bad, selfish and unselfish, etc. This series probably began my love affair with books that continues today.

In high school, of course, we read all of the classics – To Kill a Mockingbird, Romeo and Juliet, The Grapes of Wrath, Moby Dick, Hamlet, The Glass Menagerie, Crime and Punishment, The Great Gatsby, A Tale of Two Cities, and more.

Why Reading Enhances Personal Development

I don’t remember ever not liking a book we were reading. That continued in college too. And as an adult, the love affair continues, although some non-fiction is added to the list now and then.

But fiction is the great teacher – contributing to our own personal development in at least the 10 following ways:


1) Insight into Human Nature

We meet every possible personality through reading, and we gain understanding of what motivates the behaviours of people.

We can study the characters that appear on those pages, watch them as they react and respond to one another, deal with conflict, and expose their strengths and weaknesses. We gain perspective on such things as unselfishness, greed, ambition, egoism – the types of personality traits we encounter in real life.

Through analysing these characters in literature, I have developed better methods of dealing with people in my world.


2) Problem-Solving

One of the great things about literature is that the main character always has a conflict and problems to solve.

How those problems are solved, and the process that is used, gives us great training on solving problems (often how not to solve them) with which we are faced in life.

Of course, Romeo and Juliet did not solve their problems well, and we learn from this play the dangers of impulsivity – a good lesson for teenagers. Avid readers come to learn how to avoid the mistakes that fictional characters often make.


3) Imagination

As we age, many of us lose the imagination that so entertained us when we were children.


When we are taken to new places and meet unique people, our imaginations are stimulated. We place ourselves in those surroundings and imagine what they must be like. Science fiction does that for me, as do historical novels such as A Tale of Two Cities.

James Michener was a master at stimulating the imaginations of his readers – we are able to put ourselves there, geographically and historically, as his saga unfold. Nurturing our imaginations allows new ideas and divergent thinking.

4) Vocabulary and Language Skills

Avid readers have much larger vocabularies than those who avoid the past-time. And the reading of good books provides models of good language and writing. Research shows that the language development, both oral and written, that is fostered from reading books, results in better learning all around.

Adults who have read a lot and who continue to read are able to grasp complex written material far easier, and they are better writers overall. These are career skills which are difficult to learn later in life.


5) Relief from Stress/Escape

The mental and physical effects of stress are well documented. To relive stress, we engage in a number of activities – physical exercise, meditation, and, yes, reading. Studies have shown that blood pressure is reduce during the act of reading.

And reading allows us to focus on something other than our stressors and problems. A good story line carries us away to another place – a much healthier form of escape than alcohol or drugs.


6) Readers Develop Empathy and Tolerance

Empathy is the ability to place yourself “into the shoes” of another and see a problem, a circumstance, and a behaviour from their perspective.

As we do this in our reading, so it transfers over to real life. We learn to be less judgement of others, understanding that we have not had the experiences that have formed their personalities.


7) Readers are More Interesting People
The exposure to history, politics, the law, and unusual places, becomes a store of knowledge that we hold in our memories.

This knowledge base allows us to converse on a variety of topics, both socially and professionally. People with large bases of general knowledge are more highly valued in the professional world.


8) Readers Gain a larger Perspective

Ignorance of other cultures, religions, and ethnicity fosters hostility and fear. Knowledge and understanding of all of these fosters communication, acceptance and tolerance.

Given the global perspective which all of us must develop, reading is the next best thing to actual experience. And when we do face actual experiences with cultures, belief systems and other ethnicity, we have the understanding to establish solid and mutually respectful relationships.


9) Readers See Cause/Effect Relationships

Seeing cause-effect relationships is a critical thinking skill that is highly valued. Through fiction, we are able to see how choices that people make have an impact not only on themselves but on others around them and sometimes on society as a whole.

Readers come to understand the need to consider all of the possible effects when hard choices need to be made.


10) Readers Have Important “Alone Time”

The world is a busy place. We spend our days surrounded by others, inundated with stimuli that bombard our senses and our minds. Sometimes, it is difficult to shut down all of that stimulation and get the rest we need.

When we read, especially at the end of the day, our worlds becomes quiet. Our brains begins to settle down and prepare us for rest. Readers have a much easier time falling asleep at night – who doesn’t need a good night’s sleep?



The benefits of reading cannot be over-stated.

They are intellectual, psychological, and healthy. But even more than that, reading takes to places in our minds that we would never go otherwise. Read on!

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How to Conduct Your Personal Mid-Year Review

How often do you take the time out to really reflect on how you are progressing towards your goals for the year?

Now that we are at the half-way point of the year, it’s the perfect time to conduct your own personal mid-year review!


Why Conduct a Personal Mid-Year Review?

Conducting a mid-year review gives you the time and space necessary to evaluate your progress towards your goals.

Without taking the time out to reflect, how do you know whether your decisions, behaviour and actions for the first 6 months have helped you move towards where you want to go in your life?

Reflection is one of the most fundamental skill-sets of successful people.

If you are serious about creating your best life and making your dreams a reality, then you need to reflect to ensure you are making the right decisions and working towards them in the most effective and efficient way.
Benefits of Conducting a Personal Mid-Year Review

There are a tonne of benefits from conducting your own mid-year review.

Some of the major benefits include:

• Determine if your actions are progressing you towards your goals
• Determine if you are progressing at the right speed (i.e. will you reach your goal on time?)
• Determine if your goals are still relevant
• Understand the challenges you have faced and what learning’s you can make
• Identify more effective or efficient methods of achieving your goal

The more often you can conduct a personal review, the more effective you will become in your life.


I would recommend that you at least do a 6-monthly in-depth review of your goals. In fact, I encourage you to do it as often as you can. When I talk about these reviews, I’m talking about your ‘big life goals’.
Conducting Your Personal Mid-Year Review

Let me guide you through the process that I go through when I conduct my own personal reviews.

It is a process whereby I ask myself specific questions which help me understand exactly what I can do moving forward to work more effectively and efficiently towards my goals.


Get Yourself Setup

Before we get to the questions, the first thing you need to do is get yourself ready for your mid-year review. No, this doesn’t mean you have to dress up nicely and look pretty, it simply means you need to get yourself in an environment that is conducive for reflection.

So, to get setup:

Find yourself a nice, quiet environment
Have your goals and any other supporting materials with you that you can use to look over
Make sure you have something to write with

One piece of advice on the environment… try conducting your mid-year review away from your ‘normal’ working environment. This would mean getting out of the office, or away from your home and out into a park or somewhere where you can think about your life more objectively and freely.

Let’s get into it!

Question 1: Are My Goals Still Relevant?

Goals change over time. Life is full of surprises!

This is not something to be concerned about, but something to be aware of.

The first thing to do when conducting your personal mid-year review is to look over the goals that you have set and ask yourself whether they are still relevant.

How have your goals changed?

Sometimes when you originally set your goals the future is murky. It’s impossible to predict the future and to know with 100% certainty that a set of circumstances will eventuate. In-line with this, you may have had some clarity on the general direction of where you want to go, but now that you are six months into the year you have realised that there is a slight alternative that you are now working towards.

This is fine and goals are to be constantly tweaked and refined… this is all part of the process!

The key is to ensure that your goals are still linked to the things that you are passionate about.Passion creates the drive, energy and enthusiasm necessary for success.

When looking over your goals, it’s also good to remind yourself of WHY you are working towards them. Your goals and your life need meaning. Answering the question of why will reinvigorate the drive for making them a reality.


Question 2: What have I achieved?

Do you fall victim to ‘setting and forgetting’ your goals? Hopefully not now that you’re part of The Start of Happiness!

Now that you have confirmed that your goals are still relevant, the next step in the process is to reflect on what you have actually achieved.

How are you tracking towards your goals? What ‘mini-goals’ have you met or what smaller steps have you done to help you reach where you are?

Taking the time to reflect on what you have achieved will help you to determine whether your actions and progressing you towards your goals and whether you are likely to achieve them on time.

One of the best things about asking yourself this question is that it will highlight the behaviours and actions that have worked. This is super-important to being able to progress further in the back half of the year.


Question 3: What challenges have I faced?

When you are looking back over your progress for the year, it’s important that you also look at the challenges you have faced.

Very rarely can you reach your most important goals without a challenge being thrown your way.

Reflect on what these challenges have been. Why did these obstacles or challenges occur? How did you feel when they were presented? What did you do to overcome these challenges?

Resilience is a key factor in overcoming challenges. Understanding how you have faced these challenges and managed to overcome them helps you to build this resilience. It helps to embed the confidence in yourself that no matter what gets thrown your way you will be able to continue moving towards your goal.

The other thing that this question can raise is what can you do in the future to prevent these challenges from happening again?

Question 4: What have I learned?

Life is one big learning experience.

When you’re making progress towards your life goals you’re going to make a million decisions. Some good and some bad. One of the key ingredients that separates successful people is the ability to learn from their actions.

Looking back over your answers to the previous questions, now is the perfect time to ask yourself what have you learned from these experiences?

That is, what have you learned about your goals in life?

What have you learned from your achievements?

What have you learned from the challenges you have faced?

Taking the time to understand the key things that you have learned will help you get set-up perfectly for answering the next question.


Question 5: What can I do differently?

Now is when your mid-year review has its biggest impact. Your future.

Based on everything you have learned from answering the above questions, it’s time to think about the actions that you will put into place to make sure that the back half of the year is even more effective than the first half.

It’s all about continuous improvement! Never get complacent.

What habits do you need to change?

What extra support do you need?

What processes do you need to put in place to be more effective?

How will you address your next challenge?

This is a perfect opportunity for refining your goal and working on a specific strategy for the next 6 months of the year. You can start to map out the exact things you will do in this time to get you there.


Next Steps

There are 2 things you need to do first and foremost as next steps:
Set yourself a date for your next personal review
Write down 3 things that you can do immediately (or sometime today) to start building momentum in your life…. and go do them!

Your personal review should be a regular thing. If you can make it habitual then you’re well on your way to success.

I know of many people who write down their to-do lists or goals for a specific day, but how many people look at how those specific things on their to-do list help them progress towards their bigger goals in life?

The more regular you can review your progress towards your bigger, life goals, the more effective and the more speedy you will get there.

If you’re yet to create goals or want to go even a step back and start to look at the bigger picture in life (that is, understanding yourself and where exactly you want to go), then I highly recommend you check out our Launch Your Life Academy which guides you the proven process of making positive change in your life.

So, what are you waiting for?

Let’s make the next 6 months a ripper!

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How to Rise Above Negative People

We’ve all met people who seem to be deaf to insult and criticism.

As if by magic, unkind comments seem to run off their skin like water. Whether they laugh, give a sarcastic retort, or totally ignore the negativity of others, the event seems to evaporate from their mind within minutes. They move on to other, more exciting things.

The criticism is forgotten.

Most of us are not so lucky. Few people walk around advertising their sensitivity, so at times it may seem like a rare character trait.

However, when I reflect on the close friends and partners I’ve had over the years, I cannot remember a single one who did not identify as “sensitive” to a greater or lesser extent.

I certainly do. I will fight for my core beliefs and the causes I care about most, but otherwise try to maintain interpersonal harmony and positivity whenever possible.

I’m the kind of person who will ruminate about being honked at by another driver, still blushing five minutes after the honker has disappeared into the incessant Southern California traffic.

If a teacher ever has to say my name to get my attention, which is rare, I feel the need to apologize over and over. Even in these minor situations, hardly deserving of the term “negative,” my immediate tendency is to blame and criticize myself.

How to Rise Above Negative People

For a long time, I could not take criticism or negativity in stride. I wanted so badly to live in a world of constant peace, harmony, and politeness.

Whenever I found myself in a tense situation with a negative person, whether or not they were directly affronting me, I would try to apologize and blame myself in order to restore the peace.

I took every critique to heart, even if I was receiving constructive criticism from a close friend. Instead of dispelling negativity by blaming myself, I absorbed the negativity of others into my own body.

IN MY ATTEMPTS TO FIND PEACE IN THE WORLD, I SUCKED UP BAD FEELINGS LIKE A VACUUM.

Eventually, I learned how to deal with negativity and rise above it. Here are some of my realizations, which have allowed me to find inner and outer peace even in the face of negative interactions.

1. Change Your Mind-set about the Negativity You Receive

My problem was entwined in my mind-set about relationships and the source of unkindness and negative interactions.

If people were rude to me, I took it as a personal criticism. I thought that when other people were negative towards me, it indicated that something was wrong with me, and that I needed to change myself in order to maintain the peace.

I put so much stock in other’s opinions and moods. To make myself happy, I thought I had to make others around me happy first. Only then could I be at peace with the world.

But here’s the problem: no matter how kind, compassionate, smart, loving, considerate, and competent you are, people will sometimes be negative towards you. They will be rude and unkind.

Why?

BECAUSE WHEN PEOPLE ARE RUDE, UNKIND, AND NEGATIVE, IT’S A REFLECTION OF THEIR OWN INNER STATE. IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU.

Let me repeat: it has nothing to do with you. Negative people are not negative because of the way you look, speak, or act, but because they are having their own personal difficulties. When people are stressed, upset, and angry, they often take it out on others.

This is completely unintentional, and is a normal reaction to stress and sorrow.

When we have negative thoughts and feelings, we spread them. When we receive negativity from others, we are receiving their visceral emotional turbulence, not a true criticism of our own behaviour.

2. Remember that the Negativity is Not Personal

You can choose not to fight back, or apologize, or take it to heart. Instead, you can recognize that their negativity is coming from deep within, fuelled by their own life circumstances, and you let the criticism go. Then, you can excuse yourself and walk away. That is all.

I know that it’s easier said than done. In the moment when you’re being yelled at or complained to, it’s incredibly hard not to internalize that negative energy. Just try your best to remember that the negativity being aimed at you is not personal.

You don’t have to apologize for their negativity, because you aren’t truly fuelling it. You are just the closest available person for them to unleash their negative feelings and stress, and you have no responsibility to right their wrongs.

Think about what they’ve said and whether or not it’s really true, or just an indirect reaction to their own mental stress.

Imagine what their life situation could be – divorce, a death in the family, and trouble at work – and recognize that their negativity is only a proximal reaction to that event. Know that deep down you are not to blame.

Rise above negativity by letting it pass under you, by not identifying with it. Let it be impersonal.

3. Don’t Apologize or Seek Revenge

Depending upon what kind of person you are, it can be extremely tempting to try to solve a negative situation by blaming yourself or attacking the other person.

Unfortunately, neither of these are lasting solutions to negativity. If you apologize, you are only giving the negative person more reason to believe you are to blame, even when you haven’t done anything wrong.

THIS TEACHES THEM TO TAKE OUT THEIR ANGER ON OTHERS MORE OFTEN, AND WILL ONLY CAUSE YOU TO RECEIVE MORE BLAME IN THE LONG-RUN.

Likewise, by attacking the person back, you are adding to the negativity of the situation and giving them a real reason to be rude or aggressive towards you.

They will only become more identified with their negativity, and you will become a facet of their stress and anger. It’s better to diffuse a situation by keeping calm.

Though you may want to seek justice, remember that the negative person isn’t concerned about justice in their moment of anger. Even if you make valid points, the other person is too stressed and upset to absorb your reasoning.

You will only make matters worse, both immediately and in the long-run.

4. Let it Go and Walk Away

Next time someone is rude or critical of you, try to walk away.

This can feel like you aren’t defending yourself in the face of injustice, but the truth is, you are defending yourself in the most effective way.

If you remove yourself from a negative situation, you are defending yourself from the unfair negativity that someone is projecting onto you. You are protecting your own well-being and choosing not to fight fire with fire.

5. Find Peace and Look for the Positive

After a stressful and negative interaction, you may be emotionally unstable for a while.

In order to restore your inner harmony, you may want to spend time with a positive person in your life to reset your emotions (just remember to avoid passing on negativity to your loved one).

If you find peace in solitary, soothing activities, try to do these things after a negative interaction. Some ideas for soothing activities include bathing, working out, having a cup of tea, or reading a book. Only you know what will calm you down best.

To recover from a negative interaction, let the negative go, accept positivity, and see how harmonious life becomes. The world cannot fill you with negativity if you don’t let it in. You have the power to be as peaceful as you choose to be.

Summary

Here’s a quick low down of the 5 tips mentioned to help you rise above negative people:

Change your mind-set about the negativity you receive

Remember that the negativity is not personal

Don’t apologize or seek revenge

Let it go and walk away

Find peace and look for the positive

Recognize the root of another’s negativity, let that negativity remain impersonal, avoid apologizing and attacking, and walk away to seek a more positive atmosphere.

This is not cowardice, or running away from conflict; non-reaction is true strength. It is choosing not to fuel the world’s negativity, but to breed positivity in its wake.

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