5 Powerful Changes You Can Make To Relieve Anxiety, Stop Negative Thoughts and Be Happy

From birth to death, people have always been looking for happiness. We often hear this phrase a lot, "I just want to be happy". Have you ever stopped and thought about what it means to be "happy"? Why no matter how hard you try, happiness comes hard for you, and it seems to come easier for others? What is your personal definition of happiness? How can you tell if you're truly happy?

This post will give you a few tips and tricks to be able to change the way you think, just a little bit, that can result in powerful change in the direction of true happiness!

Let's get to it!

Recovering From Failures

The human race has built itself into what it is today using only 1 tool: failure.

A spin off of the Charles Dickens quote in the opening of his book A Tale of Two Cities goes like this: "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, truly the best of times". This means that through all the good times and all the bad times there's always a silver lining, a positive aspect that makes it all worth it.

Successful people have also faced many difficulties and failures in which they've turned into strong positive roots moving forward by learning from them and fully appreciating their roles in making themselves into more knowledgeable and better people for it.

Approval Seeking

You may sometimes be unsure if your decisions are the right ones and are constantly looking for approval from others to mitigate the risk of having a negative outcome.

In the end this behaviour may make you seem less confident in your decisions. Make concise and confident recommendations and delegations with positive expectations in mind. This will not only free your mind of the negative burden of stress and anxiety but it will also, with time and experience, make for more successful decisions and help develop confidence.

You may also be seeking the approval of your peers in school or "the popular kids". This, subconsciously, makes other feel as if you are not comfortable with who you are. You are who you are, and who you are is great. By constantly seeking approval you are suppressing your own personality. Show people who you are and remember not to look for validation from them. If you amuse yourself and make yourself happy then you will also amuse other people and they will like you for who you are.

Always anticipate that people will like you, if you really believe it then it will come true because your mind and body will make the adjustments necessary with that confidence to make it reality.

Outcome Dependency

Outcome dependency is very similar to approval seeking. What you want to try to notice when you are showing signs of outcome dependency and make conscious decisions to free your mind of the outcome, be present, go with the flow and anticipate only positivity.

If by chance your school presentation doesn't go well, you do not get the job, or your decision results poorly then you should be happy because you've just learned so much from that experience which will make you better and stronger next time!

If you are OK with learning from failures, you should have no reason to fear the outcome of a situation.

Comparisons & Jealousy

Notice your thinking patterns. You are not alone, many people often compare themselves with others in this manner, some of us may not even be fully aware that we are comparing ourselves at this, or any, extent.

We want to be prettier, happier, have more money and things; this makes us feel bad about our own self and causes us to resent and repel others, you start to miss out on great opportunities, friendships and life lessons.

Instead of comparing your life with others, compare your life only to YOUR life. Think of yourself as the only person you need to impress and prove something to. Have an inner battle with yourself, challenge yourself to be more and do more. Check in with your own progress from time to time and reward yourself for it.

Giving Positivity

Selfless acts in general make you feel positive about yourself and spread positivity to others, the more positivity we have in this world the easier it is to be happy. Compassion is one of the life's most wonderful feelings and gifts. It will make a big difference in your life and happiness.

Here are some ideas of how you can give positive energy or do some good deeds in this world:

Donate to charity

Help a friend in need

Volunteer for something you're passionate about

Buy a gift or flowers for your mother or grandmother

Allow a fellow driver to merge into your lane

Write a thank you note to someone who won't expect it

Compliment others

Hold the door for others

Say hello to others and smile

Pick up trash from the sidewalk

Help someone who seems to be struggling with something

For you to accept positivity you must firstly disarm the power that negativity has over you. Be aware and be the person you want to become.

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Do You Have The Right Mindset?

I think we can all probably agree that your actions lead to your results. If you want different results, you need to change your actions. If actions lead to your results, what leads to your actions?

Your Big Why

Your big why is, or will be, the most important reason for your success. If you plan to have success, the question that you need to answer for yourself is why do you need the success? What is the reason you get up and get at it each day? What motivates you to accomplish your goals? You need to be very clear on this and focus on it.

My big why has changed a little over the years, but the one that got me going was to help my dad. I lost my mom to cancer when I was really young and my dad raised me and my brother and sister by himself. I have zero complaints about my childhood because he was such a great parent. I owe a lot to him. Being a single parent and one income family, it was difficult for him to even think about his retirement. He was unable to successfully plan for his retirement and is still working today. I want to help him enjoy the latter years of his life and help him, if he would ever allow it, with his retirement.

Fear

I am reading the series Harry Potter right now and I think that is where I heard this quote. "Courage isn't not having fear but is acting in spite of fear." Everyone has fear of the unknown, and taking chances certainly has some unknown results. Fear is the number one career killer, and what separates successful people from average people is acting ANYWAY. This comes back to your big why. Is your big why strong enough to force you to act in spite of your fears? If not, get a new big why, so that fear does not murder your potential.

The Law of Attraction

I am a big, big believer in this. It started with the movie The Secret and has exploded from there. I have studied this and truly believe in its power. If you have no idea what I am talking about, you should start by reading or watching The Secret.

The idea here is that if you can make your mind truly believe something, it will happen. Good ways to use this resource is by affirmations. There are entire books written about how to use affirmations, but you want to put a goal in your mind, like it is already yours, by repeating it to yourself over and over and over... Vision boards are another great way to use the law of attraction. I have vision boards in my house that I look at frequently. These boards are loaded with things that I want. Your goals need to be realistic to you or you will not have much luck convincing yourself that it is yours; so start small and work your way up.

Investment or Expense?

Many people think subconsciously that money they invest in their business (like marketing) or money they spend on themselves (like education) is an expense. What I want you to believe is that these are actually investments. The reason for the distinction is that, investments pay you back with interest and expenses are gone forever. So many small companies end up failing because when things get tight, they cut their marketing budget. If things get tight, they might want to increase their marketing or become more efficient, because that is what brings in the business. Never cut the marking budget, unless you need to slow growth. Cutting that budget can be fatal. As far as investing in yourself, I believe you should continue to educate yourself constantly, but especially when you are not consistently reaching your goals. You should probably consider investing at least 10% of your personal income back into your own education until you are consistently reaching your desired results. With that being said, I am very proud to say that my company offers lots of solid educational opportunities free of charge. Now there really are no excuses.

Fake it Until You Make it

When you are trying to start something new or expand on what you are doing, there is a time in the beginning where you really don't know what you are doing. It is during this time that you are vulnerable, which of course brings fear and can potentially stop your actions. If you fake it and pretend you know exactly what you are doing, you will quickly learn what to do and how to act. That, and your confidence, will attract the people that you need to help you accomplish what you are seeking. I am not saying to lie to anyone, but you can easily lean on others experiences and act with confidence to get the job done. By not faking it, you will have a lot of hesitance and will attract more objections and more things that will hold you back.

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A Little Change Makes a Big Investment

As I wander through life there are many interesting conversations to overhear and participate in. One that's caught my attention lately is how hard change is. You can resist change and stay stuck in your situation, or you can grow through change and create a different reality.

There's no denying that change is hard, at first. The benefit of sticking with the effort to make a change is that you emerge a better person. The effort you put in is rewarded by the results you get. The path along the way can be a bit messy, even disappointing some days, but you still owe it to yourself to persevere. And you learn and grow from even the messy stuff in the middle.

Another objection to some making change is that it feel like deprivation. You gotta change that mindset. If doing things that are hard creates a feeling of deprivation, not a feeling of challenge and growth, you owe it to yourself to switch your thinking. Growth isn't a sacrifice. When you lose bad habits you are growing. You lose a bad habit by replacing it with a good habit. When you change from a bad habit to a good habit, you haven't lost a thing, you haven't sacrificed anything - you have grown and improved. There's no deprivation in growth.

In my observations and experience, deciding to change some aspect of your life - diet, physique, addiction, meditation practice... any habit you perform - is energizing. That decision is taking the first step. Taking action is the next step, and subsequent steps, until you reach your goal. That's how change is accomplished, one decision and step at a time.

Each step along the way is a chance to learn. You learn about yourself and the world. Exciting! Empowering. That's part of an Energize Me attitude. That's part of the growth that keeps life interesting and valuable.

Are you tired of at least some aspects of your life? What are you doing about it? Action versus non-action is the difference between someone living up to their potential and someone stuck in the past.

Maybe you don't strive to grow and change because it feels like too much work. That's one of the comments I hear. Consider this: you are working toward the wrong goal, you aren't passionate about the change you are avoiding. That is stressful. Altering your attitude or goal will turn hard work into passion.

Another possibility is that you haven't found the right attitude about the change you want, or are told you must make. Can you wrap your head around the idea of accepting that the change is important and taking the first step, even if it's a little one? Can you tiptoe into the change? Some people prefer jumping in with both feet - or diving in head first. Regardless, you have to move toward your goal or your desired change won't happen. What's your style?

A friend of mine has learned to live his life like a video game or movie script. By turning a challenge into a game goal - complete with points, levels, and rewards - he has been living the life of his dreams for over six years now. Now that's energizing! That's the path to success for him, and lots of his tribe.

The reality, is by taking on change you are investing in yourself. You invest in yourself in other ways, like education, saving for a goal, health, or the friends you keep; why not invest in yourself when it comes to your habits and attitudes?

You'll find your life more satisfying and gratifying as you accept that change can be hard, but that you can make it easier. You'll be energized by the action you take with that first step. You'll live a better life.

Source 

A Little Change Makes a Big Investment

As I wander through life there are many interesting conversations to overhear and participate in. One that's caught my attention lately is how hard change is. You can resist change and stay stuck in your situation, or you can grow through change and create a different reality.

There's no denying that change is hard, at first. The benefit of sticking with the effort to make a change is that you emerge a better person. The effort you put in is rewarded by the results you get. The path along the way can be a bit messy, even disappointing some days, but you still owe it to yourself to persevere. And you learn and grow from even the messy stuff in the middle.

Another objection to some making change is that it feel like deprivation. You gotta change that mindset. If doing things that are hard creates a feeling of deprivation, not a feeling of challenge and growth, you owe it to yourself to switch your thinking. Growth isn't a sacrifice. When you lose bad habits you are growing. You lose a bad habit by replacing it with a good habit. When you change from a bad habit to a good habit, you haven't lost a thing, you haven't sacrificed anything - you have grown and improved. There's no deprivation in growth.

In my observations and experience, deciding to change some aspect of your life - diet, physique, addiction, meditation practice... any habit you perform - is energizing. That decision is taking the first step. Taking action is the next step, and subsequent steps, until you reach your goal. That's how change is accomplished, one decision and step at a time.

Each step along the way is a chance to learn. You learn about yourself and the world. Exciting! Empowering. That's part of an Energize Me attitude. That's part of the growth that keeps life interesting and valuable.

Are you tired of at least some aspects of your life? What are you doing about it? Action versus non-action is the difference between someone living up to their potential and someone stuck in the past.

Maybe you don't strive to grow and change because it feels like too much work. That's one of the comments I hear. Consider this: you are working toward the wrong goal, you aren't passionate about the change you are avoiding. That is stressful. Altering your attitude or goal will turn hard work into passion.

Another possibility is that you haven't found the right attitude about the change you want, or are told you must make. Can you wrap your head around the idea of accepting that the change is important and taking the first step, even if it's a little one? Can you tiptoe into the change? Some people prefer jumping in with both feet - or diving in head first. Regardless, you have to move toward your goal or your desired change won't happen. What's your style?

A friend of mine has learned to live his life like a video game or movie script. By turning a challenge into a game goal - complete with points, levels, and rewards - he has been living the life of his dreams for over six years now. Now that's energizing! That's the path to success for him, and lots of his tribe.

The reality, is by taking on change you are investing in yourself. You invest in yourself in other ways, like education, saving for a goal, health, or the friends you keep; why not invest in yourself when it comes to your habits and attitudes?

You'll find your life more satisfying and gratifying as you accept that change can be hard, but that you can make it easier. You'll be energized by the action you take with that first step. You'll live a better life.

Source

10 Ways to Benefit From Your Greatest Fears

Once the richest man in the world, Warren Buffet was known to be the most successful investor in the 20th century.

His biggest fear was public speaking and in college, he would select courses that didn’t require him to give presentations or speak to a room full of people. He even enrolled for a public speaking course before dropping it before even attending the first session!

He was 21 when he started his career in investment and soon realized that if he wanted to mark a niche of his own, he would have to overcome his greatest fears and only then move forward.

10 Ways You Can Benefit From Your Greatest Fears

If you want to become a better and bigger version of yourself, then you have to face your fears, not run away from them. When conflict arises, most people are conditioned to take ‘flight’ instead of ‘fight’.

That’s when success comes to pass; not when you are cozy in your comfort zone, successful growth starts when you get out of your comfort zone.

When you face your fears, it gives you this strength and confidence which you thought you never had in you; fear is nature’s way to tell you to raise the bar to higher standards of living.

When you become aware that your greatest fear is meant to develop you into a better and bigger person, you will be able to then start using your fear to your own advantage. Here we have listed a few ways that you can benefit from your greatest fears:

1. Unleash Your Full Potential

If you are reading this article then you must already be aware that you have a lot of potential which is simply being blocked by your greatest fears.

Fear, if misread, stops you from progressing. Thoughts and actions that are lead by fear always fall short of your full potential. Feeling fear, would be your first cue to know that on the other side, there lies a better you.


2. Move Faster Than Your Greatest Fear

Remember that fear is always counter-intuitive, that means, fear is urging you to move forward when you ideally feel to stop. Fear is the one feeling that actually can encourage you to go ahead.

When you pause mid-sentence, stop in your tracks and begin to think that if you take another step, you will fail, you tend to start feeling fear. That’s when you need to move faster than your fear.


3. Use Fear as an Incentive to Move Ahead

When you live a compromised life, in your business or in your personal life, you start to feel weak and less confident about yourself. When you feel small, you are actually delaying the time when life wants to satisfy you.


When you embrace your fear, although, not letting it win, that’s when you begin to feel more confident.

When you overcome fear, you can increase your confidence level every step of the way.


4. When in Fear, Analyze

The fear you feel, is never without reason. Analyze what you are afraid of and why. When you spend time analyzing your fear, it can give you the chance to answer some unanswered questions and turn that negative mind-block into a positive step ahead.

5. Use Fear as a Safety Belt

Remember that fear is always your ally.

When you feel fear about something, it is a cue to pay more attention to your situation. Fear can actually tell you that ‘it’s now or never’ and other times, it can even urge you to ‘sleep on it’. Fear is your cue to stop and think, negotiate and plan your next step.

6. Get Positive Energy from Your Fear

Remember that everything you ever need is on the other side of your fear.

When you treat fear as any other feeling, that is, when you treat fear as a pathway of a new opportunity – which is a positive experience, it can give you a lot of positive energy to move forward.


7. Fear, as a Stepping Stone of Wisdom

When you do things you previously thought you ca never do, it forces you to experience new things, you then become wiser and not limited to your growth.

Fear can be linked to your instinct. Most times its hard to listen to your gut feelings, but when you feel fear, it is time to take note of it and then take action.


8. You Can Be Yourself

It’s normal to feel fear of being yourself in front of others. Most people wear masks when they are working, and they are a completely different person when they are at home.

The truth of the matter is that people are drawn to more authentic people. It is very courageous to be your authentic self when most people around you are fake.

9. You Can Make it Your Feature

Just as some bugs in IT world can be presented as features, you can do it with your fear, too. Fears can be part of your charisma, and you should not be ashamed of them.

Of course, not every fear, but some phobias that you can’t overcome just with your willpower, or some harmless types like fear of ghosts in the closet, can totally coexist with strong and successful personality.


10. You Can Organize a Club

A club for people with fear of height, or being buried alive, or finding a spider in the bed.

Such experience is:
a) Simply fun
b) Trains you to be a leader or moderator;
c) Cooperates a group of people around you, with numerous interests and experience. You can do something big together, which doesn’t have to be connected with the fear, too.
d) You can help people and yourself to overcome that fear with some activities, and just remain great friends for life.



Choose the way to turn your weakness into your strong feature, and you will benefit even from your greatest fears!

What are your greatest fears? Leave a comment below.

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