Why Daily Complaining Is Ruining Your Life

“Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.” – Dalai Lama

Sometimes life just isn’t fair. It’s dark, gloomy, and absent of happiness. What you find is that talking about the unfortunate circumstances then makes you feel better. This complaining helps you feel as though something has been released. You are now relieved.
It’s the complaining that brings on this misery.

We can think that focusing on our problems and wallowing in our complaining will make us feel better, but this is all in our thinking and what you are really doing is only reaffirming the problems that brought you to this place in your mind.

That is just it. What you are complaining about and these problems are only in your mind. Life isn’t bad or good and it rather just is. Nature has no judgement about the things that happen, whether it is the grass growing or dying, it just is.
Just as your life, just is.

People who win never complain. They take life for it gives them and they make what they can out of it. One of the most powerful Tony Robbins’ quotes that I’ve heard is:

“EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON AND A PURPOSE, AND IT SERVES YOU.”

What I remember him saying is that he doesn’t know this to be true, but that he believes it to be true because it empowers him. That is the power of the mind.

These thoughts and things that we focus on have power over our life. We can choose to focus on the negativity and the darkness in life or we can choose to look at the things that empower us.

We can choose to focus on the things that will strengthen us and make the world a better place. You have the choice to control this one thing.


Why Daily Complaining is Ruining Your Life

Of all the things in life the one thing that we can control is our mind. We have the ability to focus on what matters and we can let go of what will hold us back.

This act of daily complaining is ruining your life. It is making you less whole. It is inhibiting you from growing and reaching your potential. Complaining is standing in the way of you and the achievement of your dreams.

The following are the four most important reasons why this daily complaining is preventing you from living the life you want to live:


1. When You Complain You Reaffirm Negativity in your Mind

The mind, like nature, will accept what you give it. If you show it complaining, it will respond to the negativity put out into the universe and the messages that you are affirming about life.

When this happens you train yourself to focus on the dark and unwanted times. Your mind becomes accustomed to negative thinking and this thus brings about your negative experiences.


It is your responsibility to give it positivity. The more positivity you give it, the more it will be able to continually come back to the good things in life. Eventually positivity is the only thing it knows and responds to.

2. You Cancel Out All the Positives

When your focus is on what you are complaining about then you forget about all the good in life. It brings you to a place where all the positives in your life are just absent from your mind.

This leads you to being unaware of good times and happiness that just might mean a great deal to you and your success.

It likely would even make the difference for you when looking back on your life and all the wonderful times you could have had an even fuller awareness of. Shift the focus and bring the attention back to the positives so that you are more aware of them.


3. You Drive Others Away from You

No one likes to be around someone that brings them down. Coming up with things that are wrong in the world or life and complaining about them will only seek to drive people to not want to be around you.

In NLP we call this a process of anchoring where we associate an external behavior such as complaining and negativity with an internal emotion such as having negative feelings about that person who complained when you are around them.

When you are the complainer then it becomes just automatic for them to associate you with those negative feelings they had while you were complaining.

You want to have people associate you with good feelings such as happiness and positivity and they will want to be around you much more.

4. Your Focus on Negativity Only Brings More Negativity

It has been said that what we think about we bring about.

When we think about negative things and bring them into greater awareness through an act such as complaining then we only bring about more of those negative events and circumstances that we were complaining about in the first place.

The much better route to take is to acknowledge your emotions and understand that this isn’t what you wanted, but now you can focus even more intensely on what you do want. This is where you get the opportunity to move forward instead of backward.

Focus is one of the most important intangibles to your success in life. It is the key that most people are missing when their focus is on things that are not leading to their goals and dreams. This complaining drives your attention away from success.

The greatest successes in life have nothing to complain about.

Some might say that it is because of where they are now, but I say that they are where they are at now because they first made the shift to focus on what is important and what will lead them to their goals rather than complaining.

This change happens in the mind first.

To be successful you have to know that the journey is all on you. In the long run you will achieve your goals not just because of other people and circumstances, but because of you and your determination.

This means that other people are not the cause of your problems. Only you are. This gives you the power to take control over your life.

This ability comes from within.

The key is attuning your focus to what matters and where you want to go. What is it that you want and how can you be grateful for what you have now?

When you find life for what’s good, then that is when life will take your breath away and when you come to realize your greatest successes.


Summary

While you may think that these outside circumstances are causing the failure in life, it is actually your mind, the attention you bring to these events, and the complaining you do about such events that are bringing you to ruin.

When you can come to the realizations that everything that happens in your life can empower you and that you have control of where your life is headed, then you can take the power back for your life. This will empower you.

This negativity that comes from complaining will only reaffirm all the negative thoughts you have in your mind. It will take your attention away from anything positive.

Complaining will drive others out of your life and will only bring about more negativity into your life. The key is to reaffirm your life with positive thoughts and actions. Bring gratitude to your life instead of complaining.
How can you find yourself when you are about to complain and transform your thoughts and words into gratitude? Leave a comment below.

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6 Simple Ways To Motivate Yourself In Difficult Times

Do you struggle to motivate yourself?

As we progress in leaps and bounds, ushering the latest technology into the comfort of our home, we are giving into impulsiveness with every passing day.

We are ushering competition, stress and anxiety into our lives. Amidst bigger dreams and even bigger goals, falling short of contentment at times, can be natural.

Or life could pose with some complex threats such as emotional conflicts and financial insufficiency which could be extremely stressful to combat.

For some people while a sound emotional support helps to a large extent, however for the ones who are generally not very expressive, difficult times can seriously pose a threat to your physical and mental well being.



6 Ways to Motivate Yourself in Difficult Times

In such difficult times, digging deep for inspiration is important. It is also essential to remain self motivated and nurture yourself during this period. Passion and purpose always go hand in hand and success and happiness follow.

Here are simple and important ways to motivate yourself during difficult times.


1. Know that ‘This too shall pass’

As the above adage goes, every material condition, positive or negative, is temporary.

Therefore, first and foremost know that difficult times are just a phase which will eventually disappear. Every individual on this earth dwells with their respective share of difficulties. The more we experience, the more we grow.

Hold yourself together and try to remain with perseverance during tough times. You cannot choose or control your circumstances, but you can choose your attitude towards your circumstances. Realize that you have come a long way. Learn from your mistakes and move on.
2. Create A Purpose

All of us have our individual purposes to pursue. Invest in larger and deeper goals of life. De-clutter and start simple and eventually, work your way towards them one by one.

Be true to yourself and evaluate your current state of being. Analyze how much work you can do in the present circumstances and begin small. If you are facing financial strains, consider changing career options or enrolling for a learning course which will give you that breakthrough.

Develop a mantra in life. Write it down and look at it every morning you wake up and ensure that you swear by it for the rest of the day.


3. Take A Break from Your Worries

Let go off your worries for once and venture out. Take a break. Spend considerable time outdoors amidst nature. Take a break at the beach or the mountains or simply go for a long drive during the weekend.

Venture with friends or just go alone. You can go camping and spend a few days away from all the materialistic pleasures.

Switch off your phone, laptop or other gadgets when you are on vacation. Open your mind and think empowering and expansive thoughts. Breathe and feel the moments.


4. Surround Yourself With People Who Care

Family and friends can be your support during hard times.

Many of our worries come from self doubt. Keep in touch and confide into people who care for you and who want to see you succeed. Have open conversations about your stressful times and allow them to share advice and thoughts. Socialize with optimistic people.

If you live away from family, call them and speak to them often. Meet up friends and indulge in light conversations. Motivation is contagious and the moment you interact with individuals who are cheerful and upbeat, you will catch the vibe too.


5. Love Yourself

Hard times can take on a toll on your health. Ensure that you drink enough water and maintain healthy eating habits.

Get enough sleep everyday and when you do so, detach yourself from all the gadgets and distractions. Wake up early and begin your day. Make your mornings simple and stress free. Have a wholesome breakfast. Exercise regularly and listen to music.

Celebrate even the smallest of accomplishments. Maintain a journal to note down your thoughts, emotions and aspirations. Do not compare yourself with others. There will always be people ahead of you and some of them, much ahead. Focus on your results, instead of others’.


6. Pursue A Passion

Pursuing a creative habit would inculcate concentration and bring peace. It’s the seriously the best way to motivate yourself.

It will divert you from your constant worries. Remember, that anxiety will not assist you in motivating yourself in difficult times. You need to demonstrate ultimate perseverance and perform to the best of your opportunities if you want to sail out of tough times.

You could join the local salsa classes, take piano lessons or simply learn a new language. Do something what you’ve always wanted to do or something you are good at. Harnessing your creative side will make you bring more peace into your soul.

Additionally, your mind will not have to rigorously function. You will find solace in your creative endeavors.


Summary
Life is of greater ease to those who possess wisdom and practice perseverance.

Be kind to yourself. When you let go of yourself, going gets even more difficult. Refuse to worry about circumstances which are beyond your control.

Life is not a bed of roses for anyone. Each of us share a balanced proportion of good and bad times.

Difficult times make us braver and stronger. Equip yourself so that no matter how hard times get, you are able to motivate yourself and sail through until you regain peace and harmony back in life.

Live! Love! Laugh!

How do you motivate yourself? Leave a comment below.

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